What decisions in my life gave me the biggest growth?

Here are some of them:

Career:

The decision to start my own advertising hot-shop, Purple Patch in my first career. I learned to manage money, people, time, clients - in a way I would never have been able to, prior to that.

The decision to learn Xactly, and become a freelance Commissions Analyst in my second career.

I learned to be flexible.

I learned to adapt to different client’s needs, priorities, quirks, and limitations - over 17 clients in all.

I became the ideal temp in the process.

Hobbies:

The decision to start a blog.

I grew into a writer, who cared less about making an impression, and into a writer, who cared about sharing my thoughts, having an influence, leaving a legacy, and helping people avoid the mistakes I have made.

Over time, my writing has become simpler and simpler.

I aim to reach the maximum number of readers.

I do this with answering questions on Quora as well.

Quora has been a great lab.

If an answer of mine gets a lot of views on Quora, I understand the question must be important to a lot of people.

So I republish the Quora answer on my blog, so it can benefit the readers of my blog.

Author Joseph Sestito helped me to become less self-cherishing in my writing.

I have hit the publish button on blog posts and Quora answers, even when I am uncertain about their quality, thanks to reading his book, Write For Your Lives.

I have matured into a less self-cherishing person, overall, thanks to the wisdom that time, experience, reading, listening, conversing, meditating, and attending Sunday services, has brought me.

Finances:

The decision to become financially savvy.

Becoming a freelancer made me sharply aware of the need.

Freelancers cannot afford to take their eye off of their finances.

There will be gaps between assignments, when no money comes in.

I made the decision to become a freelancer, knowing this fully well.

I felt I was in a good position to become a freelancer.

I had low monthly bills to pay, being a minimalist.

I had absorbed the idea that minimalism is the shortest route to financial freedom, by reading online articles by Mr. Money Mustache and other FIRE advocates, for years before.

I doubled down on the idea, after becoming a freelancer, giving myself the goal to create FMG money.

FMG money is necessary for success if you are a freelancer, or any sort of self-employed person - whether hairdresser, or electrician, personal trainer, or consultant.

I was in great shape to create FMG money, for one thing, having done my taxes myself continuously since 2003, and two, having read a lot of finance books, including Robert Kiyosaki’s book Rich Dad Poor Dad, which was a wake-up book for me.

When it came to my stock investments, I ate humble pie and donuts early, and never looked back.

Life Choices

The decision to have a child.

It changed my habits, and changed my priorities.

Suddenly, there was this little thing that was completely dependent on me for everything.

I became more responsible.

I stopped drinking, not wanting to be in the position where I might need to take my daughter to a doctor, in an impaired state.

Instead of typical job benefits like more money and promotions, I asked for flexibility.

Different stages of my child's life called for different things.

So I became a different version of myself at every stage.

At this stage, Support Mom and Lighthouse Mom, are the most appropriate roles.

Relationships:

I have made my share of mistakes.

In some cases, the mistakes were because of a crisis.

What's important, is I am in a better place now, in each of my relationships - as a parent, as an ex, as a sibling, as an in-law, as a friend.

I learned to meditate in the fall of 2010, after reading the book How God Changes Your Brain.

Since then, I have worked on my anger management issues.

I have become more self-reflective.

It opened my eyes to all the "irritable unspoken commentary" that ran in my head, in response to what people said, did, even posted.

Of course, I was always right, and the other person was always wrong.

As Robert Heinlein says, "Man is not a rational animal; he is a rationalizing animal." 

I decided to improve myself inside and out.

Become  a low maintenance person.

I stopped immediately trying to launch a defense of actions and ideas, that other people do not share, or subscribe to.

Since 2014, I also began attending church on Sundays.

Attending church has become a meaningful part of my week.

I have had many spiritual breakthroughs and creative breakthroughs, right there in church.

Speaking of creative breakthroughs, there is one from many years ago, in fact in my early years of meditation, which I never tire of sharing.

My 3 benches experience.

I find it hard to dismiss it as a pure coincidence.

Life brings us bouquets and blows.

Life brings us laughter and tears.

Life brings us things we are proud of, and things we regret.

Life brings us all that we see, hear, touch, taste, smell, read, experience, and think about.

Most of all, life brings us other lives.

All of them contribute to our growth.

After being defiantly individual, I learned to cooperate with all the other lives in my life.

After being defiantly self-centered, I became other-centered, welcoming the role of infinite wisdom, and “the other artist”.

In my quest for growth, I no longer walk alone.

There is infinite wisdom to help me grow in the future.

Grow happily, grow wisely, grow well.