The Circle I Inhabit

The Circle I Inhabit may be small

But you should know

There are many interesting characters in it

Many worth a tell and show.

There's a Mister who told me the story

Of getting an awful fright

When he saw a person walking on his home cam

In the middle of the night.

Ready with his gun behind a door

To deal with the intruder who was lurking around

The next morning he realized what he had seen

Was himself, and he laughed out loud.

There's a Miss who told me the story

Of her pants coming apart at the seams

First the left, then the right

Came undone, and almost fell off, what a scream.

Fearful of their complete descent

She walked into a clothing store nearby

And in a hurry, bought the first bit of rubbish

A pant she said was 3 times her size.

Holding it up, so it wouldn't fall.

She barely made it to the car

She told me this story and said

It was one of the funniest things to happen to her by far.

There's another Mister who had

An interesting tale to tell

He realized he was going up the down airport escalator

Luckily he realized before he fell.

And yet another Mister

Played a prank to beat all pranks

You can read the story here

To find out why his sisters thought it stank.

There’s also a Miss who told me

About this incident which occurred

Because of her son having this talent

Of imitating everyone he watched and heard.

On one of her stays in his house

She got frequent calls from him on the phone

He always managed to fool her with his imitations

Which included Chinese emperors and Russian viscounts.

One day when the phone rang

It was the Russian viscount she heard

Oh -ho, two can play at a game she chuckled

Imitating his accent and saying something absurd.

To which, the Russian viscount said, excuse me

Is this the number of Vik?

Undeterred she continued to imitate him

Determined not to fall for the trick.

Once again, the Russian viscount asked for Vik

And said perhaps he had the wrong number

When he told her he was a recruiter at a company Vik had applied to

It was only then she realized she had made a blunder.

I’ll end with a story told me by a miss

About some employees who complained they were going through hell

Because a coworker seated next to them

Couldn’t be bothered about letting off smells.

She decided to confront him

It was her job to handle HR complaints big and small

Taking him to a conference room, she knew what she had on her hands

Was a challenge not easy at all.

"Could you be doing anything"

she asked him, "that could be upsetting to the people nearby?"

"No" he said, nonchalantly

"Nothing I can think of, why?"

She approached the subject this way and that

Being as oblique as one possibly can

But nothing she said, unfortunately

Triggered the idea of the problem to the man.

Eventually she had to come out and say it

You are passing gas and it is smelly

"Oh that's the acai juice I've been drinking" he said completely unperturbed

"It does that in the belly."

"Belly or not, I would have to move you"

She sternly told him, "unless you can immediately control this"

Realizing there was no way out

He agreed to bid his acai juice goodbye and desist.

So you see it doesn't matter

That the circle I inhabit is small

There are enough things going on all the time

To keep me quite enthralled.

I think of Jane Austen

With all those wonderful stories to tell

Her secret, though she rarely left home

The interesting circle in which she dwelt.

And so dear reader, don’t fret

If the circle you inhabit is small

All you have to do is share stories with each other

To keep everyone enthralled.

Dear Reader...we may not be able to solve each other's problems. But we can keep each other engaged, encouraged, thoughtful, and of course, smiling and laughing.  Let's try to keep each other going in all of these wonderful and easily accessible ways.