Beyond just sharing information, what changes do I hope to stir in your perspectives and actions, as a result of my writing?

I hope to make you see your problems with new eyes.

Minoo Jha

 · 6y

What should you expect from your life?

Hi, You asked, What are some things that are expected in life? Problems are to be expected in life. How you handle your problems is key to living a good life. Here’s my advice… See problems as puzzles to be solved. Don't see problems as something to ignore. Nor should you see problems as something to complain about, moan and groan about, or to throw money, emotional energy, angst and sleepless nights, fretting and fuming at. If you want to live a better life, start seeing all problems as puzzles to be solved, rather than monsters over which you have no control. Learn to ask questions. Learn to seek solutions. Learn to put on your thinking hat, and tackle the problem. Don't let it grow and become a bigger problem. You should do this, even if you find the problem embarrassing. Don't suffer in private, because you can't risk someone knowing you have a problem. Don't let the problem get worse and worse in secret. Don't let a small problem grow into a giant problem. Get help as soon as you can. Find out who can help you. Find out what steps you can take. Find out how others have overcome the problem. You can be too private for your own good. When I first got depressed, I decided to stay quiet about it. I didn't want to risk my image. Everyone thought I was a person who had it all. I didn't want to blow this image. I wanted keep my image intact. It was such that my image mattered more than the truth. My image mattered more than my suffering. My image mattered more than the reality of my life. The reality was I was not myself emotionally. I was waking up every morning and bursting into tears. But I didn't want anyone to know that. I couldn't bear the idea. All I cared about was “my image”. My image was that of a “successful advertising consultant who had it all - money, success, a happy marriage.” On the whisper circuit, I was rumored to be "the best paid advertising copywriter in the city". I desperately wanted to keep the image going. Even at the risk of becoming more and more of a basket case. I kept my depression secret for months. I hoped it would just vanish. It had mysteriously come on. I hoped it would just as mysteriously go away. Except…it didn't. I finally picked up the courage to speak up and tell someone. One that day, as usual I got up in the morning and burst into tears. But on this day, I called a friend and told her. I said, "……(her name), I don't know what is happening. Every morning I wake up and start crying." She said, "It's a clinical depression, Minoo. I had it some years ago". "I will give you the name and phone number of a psychiatrist," she added. I shuddered at the words "psychiatrist". There are some problems no one likes to admit to - a financial problem, an addiction problem, a hoarding problem, an embarrassing cosmetic problem, a weight problem, sexually related illnesses, a marital problem. A mental health problem is in that category. It is hard to admit to. But I was relieved after I spoke up. The very first person I talked to had been through what I was going through, and was able to point me in the direction of a solution. You know how my depression story turned out. I covered it in a post I wrote a few posts ago on my blog, and in my post If Life Is So Good, Why Do I Feel So Sad? I was successfully able to resolve it and get past it. How can anything be solved if you keep it under wraps? Whatever the problem, you have a better chance if you seek help and look for solutions. You should look at every problem in your life as a puzzle to be solved. By seeking answers and solutions, ideas will come to you, and you will discover things you can try. So here’s what you do when problems arise in your life… You would be wise not to ignore it. You would be wise not to minimize it. You would be wise not to let it whirl around and around in your head, without doing anything about it. Even if you are uncomfortable - you need to talk about it, and get some inputs and strategies. Find someone and share your problem with them. The worst that will happen is they will say they can't help – because they don't have any expertise or resources in that area. But they may point you to people and resources that can be of help to you. You may need professional help, like I did. So take out a piece of paper. First thing you should do is write down what your problem is. Then make a list of the things you can do about it. Make a list of people you can talk to, and other ways to get information. And after you have talked to people, and done your research, pick a solution and start putting it to work. If the first solution doesn't work, try another. If that doesn't work, try another. This is how, sooner or later, you will make strides towards resolving your problem. Even problems you have had for years and years. A friend of mine told me what inspired her to become so interested in, and inspired by, nutrition. She had eczema as a child. Her parents had taken her to doctor after doctor, and they had tried treatment after treatment. Nothing worked. When she was in her early twenties, she decided to radically change her diet. She started eating raw foods instead of processed foods. Her eczema went away. Her eczema had been a constant companion all of her childhood and teenage years, but she was able to find a solution in her 20s. So even if a problem has been a constant companion all your life - you know my advice… See it as a puzzle to be solved. So, in conclusion, problems are to be expected in life, but if you see them as puzzles to be solved, rather than something to moan and groan about, you will be a victor rather than a victim, a hero rather than a drama king or drama queen.

I hope to make you financially stronger:

Minoo Jha

 · 6y

What are the quickest steps to financial freedom?

Hi, You asked, What are the quickest steps to financial freedom? Here’s how to become a money magnet… * Find out what the job market pays good money for and acquire those skills * Become a student of the job market (which should really be called the income market) so you will know when a good opportunity arises. * Look for gaps and niches you believe, or you have been told by others, you have a unique talent to fill * Read books and/or podcasts on negotiation, so you can negotiate a better salary and a better raise, and if you have a business, so you can get a price for what you offer. * While you are in a job, look for opportunities to develop a side hustle or to start a business. If you start a business, or go freelance as I did, it will change how you think about work, money, value and life * Learn as much as you can about the legal side of things * Learn as much as you can about taxes, so you can use the tax code to your best advantage * With the money that you are able to save after your expenses, invest in a 401K and/or IRA and look for other investment opportunities * Spend less than you earn, so you have money left to spare after your expenses * Invest the money you earn wisely by becoming knowledgeable about real estate, stocks, bonds, money market accounts. * Track your progress and be patient. * Think like Mr Money Mustache or Financial Mentor of the FIRE movement, and you will be in good shape. P.S. You can’t get to financial independence with a ton of debt. If you need to get out from under debt, do that with the help of Dave Ramsey’s Financial Peace University

I hope to challenge you to be strong and fearless:

Minoo Jha

 · Feb 5

What makes you stronger and fearless?

Taking the red pill - You Take The Red Pill How does one be a realist without being negative? You take the red pill You accept the cards you have been given Even if the road ahead is all uphill. __ You take the red pill. __ A winning spirit is necessary The belief that things will work out The belief that problems are just challenges to be solved And solutions will never run out. __ You take the red pill. __ Acceptance is necessary The understanding of where you are The understanding that in spite of the cards you've been dealt You can still get quite far. __ You take the red pill. __ Courage is necessary The boldness to rise The boldness to show an undefeated spirit In spite of every trial. __ You take the red pill. __ Determination is necessary The staying power to keep on The staying power to never give up Until the water from your life's well is drawn. __ You take the red pill. __ Creativity is necessary The imagination to see your dreams come true The imagination to see you and everyone you love in a better place And a happier, more fulfilled, and more secure you. __ You take the red pill. __ Inner strength is necessary The ability to bounce back from blows The ability to get back on your feet Even when setbacks bring you low. __ You take the red pill. __ Faith is necessary The power of believing The ability to hold on to faith's strong grasp Even when it's threatened by sorrow or grieving. __ You take the red pill. If you take the red pill, dear friend It will give you a different kind of pride The pride of being a victor even in the toughest of circumstances A pride money, power, position, or status can't buy. __ TAKE THE RED PILL! Dear Reader, what does taking the red pill mean? It means dealing with the messy and complex business of reality. Choosing to face up to whatever life throws at you - with the right attitude. I have seen many of you do that. In fact, it is your example that inspired me to write this piece. I want to inspire others to follow the path you have taken. This is my intention in writing this Take The Red Pill piece. Thank you for giving me that inspiration.

I hope to help you get out of the rat race, if the rat race is not what you want for yourself, or if you have grown tired of it:

Minoo Jha

 · 1y

What are the downsides to a person being a striver?

Hollow victories. I speak from personal experience. Once upon a time there was a girl. She looked around her and decided she needed to be certain things in order to feel worthwhile. “I need to be stylish” she said to herself. “I need to be thin.” “I need to be funny.” “I need to be clever.” “I need to be thrilling.” “I need to be original.” “I need to be successful.” “I need to be rich.” The girl threw herself hither and tither in many different directions in order to be all of these things. She tried many different diets and exercise programs. She read joke books. She studied the dictionary and practiced IQ tests. She thought of clever things to say. She worked hard to improve her skills. She changed jobs and rose up the ladder. She read relationship books and parenting books. She developed her tastes in music and literature and the good things in life. She left no stone unturned. But whatever the girl did, satisfaction and fulfillment was just out of her reach. When she asked herself, “am I stylish enough?” the answer was no. When she asked herself, “am I successful enough?” the answer was no. When she asked herself, “am I rich enough?” the answer was no. When she asked herself, “am I a good enough mother and a good enough spouse?” the answer was no. The girl found that in spite of how far she had come and all she had achieved, there were many things missing from her life. Happiness was missing - she was easily dejected. Fulfillment was missing - her victories felt empty. Self-control was missing - she would lose it at the drop of a hat. Peace was missing - she felt stressed and anxious most of the time. Energy was missing - she didn't have enthusiasm or passion for anything. Security was missing - she felt dread and anxiety when she thought about the future. Above, all she felt trapped in an endless cycle of keeping up - with the job, with the bills, with the house, with being a good mother, a good employee, a good spouse, and above all, her image. Then one day, the girl woke up. She realized she had been borrowing other people's ideas of a worthwhile life. She realized energy, peace, equanimity, self-control and security was what she wanted most and it would not come from pursuing wealth, approval, status or conformity. She realized being at peace and living a harmonious life was more important than being stylish, rich, clever or successful, or fitting in with the crowd. She decided to go her own way. Immediately, a weight was lifted off of her. She was free to do all the things she wanted to do without any false ideal or standard to conform to. She could go to work and focus on doing a good job, not getting ahead. She could have a conversation with people and not worry about whether she was coming across as uninformed or uncultured. She could meet people and not fret about her appearance. She could be who she was and make the decisions she wanted to and not worry about being judged. She could focus on meaning and authenticity rather than impression and image in all her interactions. That girl was me. Do you want to be like that? Raise your hand, if you do. How do you do that? You do that by waking up from trying to be Ms. Perfect living the “perfect life”. Perfection is the enemy of our peace, our equanimity, and our tranquility. If we let it raise its head, it can make us feel miserable about everything we do and all areas of our life. And it will keep our wheels stuck in the sand. If I aimed for perfection every time I sat down to write an article on my blog, it would never get off the ground. I would ask myself - “Is this funny enough?” “Is this clever enough?” “Is this thrilling enough?” “Is this special enough?” “Is this original enough?” “Does it have enough witticisms?” Of course, the answer would be no. I am not good with jokes. My thoughts are rarely original. And I can't come up with a witticism to save my life. So I would spend oodles of time trying to compensate by perfecting a sentence here, or a phrase there. And all I would be doing by that is spinning my wheels, indulging in what Joseph Sestito, author of Write for Your Lives, calls “self-cherishing”. Self-cherishing is focusing on the impression we want to make rather than the ideas we want to communicate. The downside of being a striver is that you can become so focused on striving, you can forget what it is you are striving for. At bottom, what we all want is a worthwhile life. But each of us needs to separately think what that means to us. Because borrowing your idea of a worthwhile life may leave me feeling unfulfilled and empty. And borrowing my idea of a worthwhile life may leave you feeling unfulfilled and empty. If everyone is buying houses, is buying a house essential to a worthwhile life? Only you can answer that for yourself. The answer was no for me. If everyone is buying fancy cars, does it mean buying fancy cars is essential to a worthwhile life? Only you can answer that for yourself. The answer was no for me. If everyone has a partner, does it mean having a partner is essential to a worthwhile life? Only you can answer that for yourself. The answer was no for me. So my advice to strivers is to know what it is you are truly striving for. Craft a personal definition of success

I hope to inspire you to to spend your time on things that matter:

Minoo Jha

 · 6y

What do you wish you could tell your 22-year-old self?

Hi, You asked,What is something you would’ve told your 22 year old self? I would tell my 22 year old self to make more time for the things that matter, and make less time for the things that don’t. I wrote a post on this last year. Reprinting an adapted version below… Make more time for the things that matter. Make less time for the things that don’t. Fall is almost here. Soon the green leaves on the trees will turn yellow, then brown, then fall to the ground. Then the temperatures will quickly drop, and winter will be upon us. This year was a year of newness for me. After 2 years of consulting in commissions administration for Fortinet, I went to LinkedIn, then Rubrik, then back to LinkedIn, and now I am already on my next assignment, my fourth for this year. This year was also a year, in which I decided to make time for the things that matter. My sister Angie and her husband died in January, and I made time to go to their memorial in Madison, Wisconsin. We had already had a farewell for Angie in the Bay Area, but when friends of Angie and Jim urged me to come to the memorial they were holding in April for Jim and Angie, I decided to go. And I decided to make it as meaningful as possible. So I read a poem I had written for Angie and Jim to the dear friends of Angie and Jim who were at the memorial. And I asked one of them to spend the next day with me, and take me to Angie’s favorite haunts in Madison. I commemorated this day in my post Angie I Will Remember For You. This year was to bring us sadness and joy in equal measure. The sadness was Angie and Jim’s untimely passing. The joy was my brother David’s daughter’s wedding. My daughter and I traveled to Washington DC to attend Jasmin’s wedding to Joey – a charming wedding which was an amazing experience. I did other things this year. Like volunteering to create and conduct a quiz at the NCMA (Northern California Mangalorean Association) Spring and Fall events. This required me to make time for internet research. I had to find material for the quiz – which was to be based on Mangalorean Catholic history, culture and traditions. It was a rewarding exercise. I learned so much about Mangalorean Catholic culture, history and traditions. I then went on a hunt to find the right prizes. Eventually I settled on caps, which were economical, and would also be good for the heat. A friend - who also belongs to NCMA – painted an NCMA logo and a small cashew emblem on the caps, cashews being symbolic of Mangalore. I felt I had done something meaningful for the NCMA with the quiz. It was a way of bringing long-forgotten history and traditions to mind. Make more time for things that matter. Make less time for things that don’t. This is the advice I would give my 22 year old self.

I hope to bring hope to those in your families, who don't want to waste time and money on a college degree:

Minoo Jha

 · 4y

Do we really need a bachelor degree in order to be successful?

If there is a need, I didn’t get the memo. Here’s My Story… I was enrolled in the Undergraduate Bachelor of Arts program at Jyothi Nivas College, Bangalore, India, with the intention to get a bachelor’s degree. But of course, intentions are not enough. We have to do whatever needs to be done. And I wasn’t able to satisfy even the basic requirement of attending a minimum number of classes in order to sit for my exams. With the result, my attendance was short and I was barred from taking the year-end exam. I was told I could take it 6 months later. But since this would put me out of step with my classmates, it had no appeal. 'This going to college business is not working for me, ' I told myself. 'Better to switch to independent study'. Basically giving myself the license to carry on with my activities and diversions. Just as I pleased. As to these activities and diversions, some were respectable, some not. The Truant Student Becomes A Teacher Overnight, it seemed, India had become a mecca for Middle Eastern students seeking a college education. These students needed to learn English ASAP. My college-professor sister started offering them English language lessons in her spare time. We (another sister and myself) decided to jump in and start giving ESL lessons as well. So when I switched to "independent study", I was tutoring 4 students, and making quite a chunk of change. House of the Rising Sun Then there was my guitar. Where there's a teenager, usually there's not one far off. Except that this teenager knew all of 6 guitar chords. With those 6 chords, I would spend all my free time (created from not going to college) singing "The House of the Rising Sun' , Joan Baez's 'Banks of the Ohio', and whatever else comprised Baez' most monotonous songs. Over and over and over again. It must have been quite challenging for the neighbors. One of them came to our door. "Please,", he pleaded to my parents, "if she must sing, can she mix it up a bit? She's repeating the same songs over and over again." Move over Beethoven 'House of the Rising Sun', Joan Baez and my 6 guitar chords were a launching pad for me to start composing music. You have no idea. While my family delighted in my creative output, the neighbors and anyone who was trapped in our house would find themselves at the receiving end of mind-blowing lyrics like this: "A Tooter Who Tooted the Flute. Tried to Tutor to Tooters to Toot Said the Two to the Tooter Is it Harder to Toot Or to Tutor two Tooters to Toot And she sells sea shells on the sea shore And the sun shines on the shop signs And the sun shines on the shop signs And I'm stuck for more rhymes to go on". Yes, I actually composed a song, the lyrics of which were entirely composed of Tongue Twisters. I still know the tune to this little ditty and can sing it for you, sans guitar. Mercifully, I abandoned the guitar as soon as I was exposed to "real" musicians. My present neighbors have no idea how lucky they are. When The Sun Shone At Night Not going to college released me from peer pressure. So I was quite the oddball. For a while, I wore sunshades day and night. Michael Jackson style. Folks later told me they thought I had started using something. Actually, I just liked the way I looked in shades. The most significant thing which happened as a result of doing my bachelors in escapism, masters in goofing around and PhD in musical torture was that I began to write. I would find an entertaining topic, write up a little sketch and send it off to the local newspaper. A few pieces got accepted. One of those pieces caught the eye of someone who worked in an advertising agency. She knew my sister. So she called my sister and said "we have a copywriting job for that sister of yours who writes for the newspaper." The rest is history. Ogilvy. But Without The Castle in France I joined a local agency as a Cub Copywriter. And never looked back. That is until... I emigrated to the US and switched careers. And discovered through reading job description after job description, that just maybe I would have been better off finishing college when I was supposed to. What prompted me to think about all of this was that James Altucher, a Hedge Fund Manager, author and RealMoney founder, did a controversial interview on Tech Ticker - discouraging people from going to college. In this interview "Don't Send Your Kids to College - It's a Scam", he talks about why the high costs of college tuition are not worth it. In a follow up to this (and as a response to the huge amount of backlash he received), he went back on Tech Ticker with "8 Alternatives to College." As one of those unfortunates without a college education, I couldn't help getting a warm feeling from these frontal attacks on formal education. Terrible as it sounds, I do feel vindicated.

I hope to help you find your purpose:

Minoo Jha

 · 2y

What are you supposed to do in life?

There is a purpose and a plan for you There is a purpose and a plan for you And a purpose and a plan for me And when we reach a certain point in our lives, You and me will clearly see What that plan and purpose is For you, and for me. __ That plan and purpose may be To add to the music of the world To make people dance And smile And weep And be moved Set their emotions in a whirl This is what that plan and purpose may be To bring the magical and intense power of music into reality And when we reach a certain time in our life, It will be clear for us to see That music was the plan and purpose Music was the plan and purpose, for you, or for me. __ That plan and purpose could be To cook and to feed To put things on the table To use all the wonderful things that are sown And that are grown And that are waiting for the skillful touch of someone with a passion to put ingredients together in an artistic and satisfying way This is what the plan and purpose may be And when we reach a certain point of time in our life, This is when we'll see That the joys of cooking and serving up culinary delights Was what our plan and purpose was meant to be. __ That plan and purpose may be To create art With words and ideas, with paper and paint, with metal and stains, or performances with various names To use the color palette and materials, and ideas of the world To craft beautiful or exciting works of art With our imagination, and a touch of inspiration To bring to life something magical that has never be seen, experienced, heard This is what that plan and purpose may be And when we reach a certain point of time in our life, It will be clear for us to see That our life was meant for art And our art was meant to be. __ That plan and purpose may be To heal, save, or protect To help reduce the vulnerability Of the young, the weak, the helpless, the sick Or those who are in a position Where danger or suffering lurks, and where they are not supposed to be A plan which asks us to be selfless and brave Thinking of only one thing - how to protect, how to free, how to heal, how to save And how to fight for what is right. This is what that plan and purpose may be And when we reach a certain point in our life, Or when certain things happen, It will be clear for us to see That protecting, healing, and saving lives, and fighting for what is right, is our plan and purpose Protecting, healing, and saving lives, and fighting for what is right, is what our plan and purpose is meant to be. __ That plan and purpose may be To create solutions to problems, or to solve life's puzzles and mysteries The puzzles of illness, the puzzles of limitations The puzzle of problem personalities or system deficiencies To solve with test-tubes, or analysis With hypotheses, calculations, and deductions The problems of humanity That are keeping the world from moving forward This is what our plan and purpose may be And when we reach a certain time in our life, It will be clear for us to see That our life was meant to create solutions, or to solve life's puzzles and mysteries Finding answers and creating solutions is what our plan and purpose was meant to be. __ That plan and purpose may be To teach To open minds, open hearts, and open eyes To create aha moments and generate insights. To help human beings become better at processing information And able to think better about any situation That is what our plan and purpose may be To shine a light where there's ignorance, so people begin to see Everything there is to know about A, and how it is different from B. And when we reach a certain time in our life It will be clear for us to see That shining a light was the plan and purpose Teaching and enlightening human beings is what our plan and purpose was meant to be. __ Or our plan and purpose may be To live a life of quiet satisfaction, quiet dignity, and doing our duty And by our actions, to be a role model to relatives, friends, acquaintances, coworkers, and everyone we meet Which may seem like nothing But really is everything When you consider it is the exception, rather than the rule, And maybe, we are not able to see that this is what our plan and purpose was meant to be Or to appreciate its value, Until we have done this or that, and it becomes clear for us to see That to live a life of quiet satisfaction, quiet dignity, and doing our duty, Is as grand a plan and purpose as ever a plan and purpose could be And we should each, celebrate this discovery That a life of quiet satisfaction, quiet dignity, and doing our duty, Is as grand a plan and purpose as ever a plan and purpose could be. __ Here's to your plan and purpose, And to my plan and purpose, Whatever that plan and purpose may be, And even if we are still in the process of discovering, What our plan and purpose is meant to be, Let's wish each other well for our journeys. Your journey and my journey, Our journeys of discovering What our plan and purpose is meant to be. Here's to us enjoying that journey Whatever it brings along the way, Whatever it brings you, And whatever it brings me.

These are just some of the things, I hope my writing helps you with.

And, dear friend, or family member, even if my writing just makes you stop and reflect for a few minutes -- on your thoughts vs mine, it is more than sufficient reason for me to keep writing. So, thank you! thank you! Your reading has helped me keep this blog going.😊