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We must be as this
tree - bare...each new leaf that we sprout in spring reflective of a brand
new attitude
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Is
it having a valuable talent or skill?
Is
it being credentialed?
Is
it having a good background?
Is
it being knowledgeable?
Is
it looking good and dressing well?
A
man whose first name was Thomas, and
who authored one of the most famous documents in history, said it was something
else.
He
said it was a person’s attitude.
A
person’s attitude would make him or her unstoppable in reaching his or her goal.
These
were his exact words:
“Nothing can stop the man with the right
mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with
the wrong mental attitude.”
Do
you have the right mental attitude?
Perhaps
it’s time to do an attitude check.
If
you find out you have the wrong mental attitude, you can change it.
There
is no better time than the start of a brand new year to wipe the slate clean and start afresh.
Take the attitude check…
Attitude Check 1:
Are you pessimistic
about the future?
Then
you have the wrong mental attitude.
How
can you achieve anything, reach your potential, if you are negative and
pessimistic about the future?
No
matter where you are in life, no matter how big the challenges facing you, only
if you believe things can get better, can they get better.
Only
if you believe a breakthrough is around the corner, can a breakthrough be
around the corner.
Play
your part to make that happen.
Adopt
the right attitude and put one foot in front of the other.
A
hopeful attitude is an absolute necessity.
Attitude Check 2:
Do you constantly compare
yourself with others, or to how you did in the past?
Then
you have the wrong mental attitude.
You
are judging yourself by the standards of others, or by a standard that may no longer be relevant for you.
Judging
limits you and is a trap.
Willie Stargell (one of the great
names of baseball) wisely said, “Judgment traps you within the
limitations of your comparisons. It inhibits freedom.”
When
you compare yourself with others, or dwell on what you did in the past, and try to keep pace with that or make that your focus, you limit
yourself.
You limit yourself to stale choices, or to the paths and choices others have made.
You limit yourself to stale choices, or to the paths and choices others have made.
What
good is that?
You
will achieve much more, if you instead work with where you are now, and work with all that you are uniquely blessed with.
Your
unique advantages, skills, gifts and abilities.
Your
unique background.
Your
unique training and experience.
Your
unique interests.
Your
unique eye, your unique hand, your unique voice.
And the unique opportunities before you.
And the unique opportunities before you.
Be
in tune with what's possible - what you can bring to the opportunities of the present moment - and you will find the right answers and the right course.
If
you do something just because everyone else is doing it, or because you think
you have to conform to some ideal, it will exhaust you, frustrate you, leave you feeling empty, even make you ill, because it ignores the fact of who you are and where you are.
My
post The Element of Understanding That It’s Never Too Early or Too Late To Begin Or Do Something - Part 3 tells you how I made myself ill by trying to conform to an ideal
standard.
Craft
a unique success and a unique glory, relevant to your present circumstances.
Forget
about comparing yourself to anybody, or what was before.
Make
this a goal for the New Year.
Attitude Check 3:
Are you afraid to ask questions?
Then
you have the wrong mental attitude.
Og Mandino, who wrote the
bestselling book, “The Greatest Salesman
in the World” said, “Take the attitude of a student, never
be too big to ask questions, never know too much to learn something new.”
You
will remain stuck in ignorance, unless you can be honest and humble about what
you don’t know.
You
have to look for the gaps in your knowledge and ability, and seek
ways to fill those gaps.
Sucking up your pride if you have to.
Sucking up your pride if you have to.
Train yourself to ask questions.
Successful authors do it….
Successful authors do it….
Nicholas Sparks, author of The Notebook and Nights in Rodanthe says, “By reading a lot of novels in a variety of
genres, and asking questions, it's possible to learn how things are done - the
mechanics of writing, so to speak - and which genres and authors excel in
various areas.”
Train yourself to ask questions.
Successful architects do it…..
Train yourself to ask questions.
Successful architects do it…..
Thom Mayne, one of Los Angeles’s
3 leading architects, and a Pritzker
prize winner says: “Architecture is a result of a process
of asking questions and testing them and re-interrogating and changing in a
repetitive way.”
Train yourself to ask questions.
Successful entrepreneurs do it….
Train yourself to ask questions.
Successful entrepreneurs do it….
Ben Horowitz, founder of OpsWare and Andreessen Horowitz says, “In my own experience as a C.E.O., I
would find myself laying awake at 3 A.M. asking questions about my business,
and there weren't management books out there that could help me.”
Like
Horowitz, you may be in an original situation, and you may have to ask your own
unique questions.
But
your road to knowledge and insight starts there.
Start asking questions.
Ask different people the same questions.
Keep asking the questions until you find the answers.
Ask different people the same questions.
Keep asking the questions until you find the answers.
Make
this one of your goals for the New Year.
Attitude Check 4:
Do you make excuses for your failures?
Then
you have the wrong mental attitude.
George Washington
Carver, the American botanist and inventor who defied all odds,
said, “Ninety-nine percent of the failures
come from people who have the habit of making excuses.”
Benjamin Franklin, The First American, said, “He that is good for making excuses is
seldom good for anything else.”
Carlos Santana, the 10 time Grammy award winner, observed, “Most people don't have that
willingness to break bad habits. They have a lot of excuses and they talk like
victims.”
Excuses
keep us from reaching our goals.
It
is easy to make excuses about why we can’t do this or do that.
It
is easy to make excuses for why something went wrong.
It
is easy to make excuses for why we continue to do the things we do.
It’s
easy to think of ourselves as helpless victims of fate.
Imagine
if any of the people in my post How To Let Nothing Come Between You and a Fulfilling Life thought themselves
helpless victims of fate?
We
would not have had Marlee Matlin's
brilliant performance in Children of A Lesser
God.
Imagine
if Laura Hillenbrand decided to let
her debilitating illness be an excuse to do nothing with her life?
We
would have been denied of two great books to read, and two great movies to watch:
Sea Biscuit and Unbroken.
Stop making excuses.
Stop making excuses.
Stop
acting like a helpless victim of fate.
Stop
being good for nothing but making excuses, or having excuses made for you by
other people.
It
will take you nowhere.
Dust
yourself off and make a sincere effort.
Change
whatever needs to be changed.
My
post Path to Change may give you
some inspiration.
Make
this a goal for the New Year.
Attitude Check 5:
Are you quick to find
someone to blame?
Then
you have the wrong mental attitude.
Blaming
someone is a variation of making excuses.
It’s
easy to play the blame game.
It’s
much harder to accept responsibility.
J. Michael Straczynski (of
Amazing Spider Man comics fame)
says: “People spend too much time finding
other people to blame, too much energy finding excuses for not being what they
are capable of being, and not enough energy putting themselves on the line,
growing out of the past, and getting on with their lives.”
As
Straczynski says, if we want to get
on with our lives and forget about the past, we have to stop blaming.
Every
minute spent blaming, is a minute of wasted time we could use to improve or
correct a situation.
Make this a goal for the New Year.
Make this a goal for the New Year.
Attitude Check 6:
Do you think it is okay to
cut corners?
Then
you have the wrong mental attitude.
When
we cut corners, we don’t care about whether we are doing things the right way.
And
if we don’t care about whether we are doing things the right way, we won’t go far.
Abraham Lincoln said, “I am not bound to win,
but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live by
the light that I have. I must stand with anybody that stands right, and stand
with him while he is right, and part with him when he goes wrong.”
Joel Osteen, (Senior Pastor of Lakewood
Church, mentioned in my post 4 Lessons Learned From Spinning in the Rain) says, “Keep a good attitude and do the right
thing even when it's hard. When you do that you are passing the test. And God
promises you your marked moments are on their way.”
Arnold H Glasow, who wrote Glasow’s Gloombusters at the age of 92, said, “Success is simple. Do what's right,
the right way, at the right time.”
We
should aim to do things the right way.
We
will make mistakes.
But when we make mistakes, we should recognize our mistakes and vow to do things the right way the next time round.
But when we make mistakes, we should recognize our mistakes and vow to do things the right way the next time round.
That
is the right mental attitude.
Each
one of us should make this a goal in the New Year.
Attitude Check 7:
Do you get flustered
when things don’t go as planned?
Then
you have the wrong mental attitude.
Brian Tracy (one of the great
names in sales training and personal development says) commented: “You cannot control what happens to
you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that,
you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.”
Become the master of your emotions rather than let your emotions become the master of you.
Become the master of your emotions rather than let your emotions become the master of you.
Whenever
things go wrong, take a few deep breaths.
Do not say anything.
Do not write anything.
Do not do anything.
Wait for the blood to stop pumping in your head
and for your thoughts to become collected.
If
you learn to meditate (and the sooner you
do it the better), you will be able to go to your calm center whenever things
go wrong.
Want
to learn to meditate?
You
can find out how I did that here.
You
can also use visualization techniques.
You
can read about visualization techniques I and others have used in my posts The Element of Imagination and Its Hope for Helping Us Develop Toughness With Compassion and Artful Flair
and my post The Element of Choosing the Right Tools for Your Path and Its Hope for Helping You Put One Foot in Front of the Other.
James Allen, whose book As A Man Thinketh everyone should read, said, “The more tranquil a man becomes, the
greater is his success, his influence, his power for good. Calmness of mind is
one of the beautiful jewels of wisdom.”
A
cool mind is not just one of the most beautiful jewels of wisdom, it is one of the greatest assets.
If
you have houses, cars, horses, stocks, bonds, rental properties, jewelry,
valuable art, but you don’t have a cool mind, you don’t have one of the greatest
assets.
But
you can start working on that now.
Make
this a goal for the New Year.
Commit yourself to these new attitudes and you will be unstoppable in reaching your goals.
Cheers to that!
As always, thanks for
reading and have a great day and week….M…..a Pearl Seeker like you. Thanks to Ajay and Ananda for their comments
and wishes on Facebook, and thanks to the rest of you for your likes, pins and
votes. Much appreciated. Or Grtz as they say in some parts of Europe (thanks to Wendy who lives in Belgium for teaching me that).
P.S. 1 – Can you guess
the last name of the man named Thomas and the name of the famous document he authored?
P.S. 2 – If you liked this post, do come back for part
2 of Attitude Check next week.
