Splendid Post, What!

                            Magical Wodehouse

I was sixteen and looking for some good reading when I strolled into my nearby government library, it being the only library in the neighborhood in what was then a laidback and sleepy Bangalore. The under stocked library kept none of my favourite authors which then included Captain W.E. Johns, Arthur Hailey, Irving Wallace and Nevil Shute.

Idly, I browsed the shelves- surely there would be some good reading around, even in a government library. A mischievous gleam came into my eye……perhaps a new author? A new voyage of discovery ? Who knew what treasures lay hidden in those dusty old shelves?

Five books neatly stocked side by side, caught my eye; all by “P G Wodehouse”.

Aha ……..I told myself. With this many titles, I could be on to a good thing. Shall I take a chance?

I pulled out a book. “Brinkley Manor” read the title (subsequently re-named “Right Ho Jeeves”). It had a catchy illustration and a brief perusal of the back cover told me I was in for “Something Fresh”.

That began a magical odyssey that kept me reading all through my college and early working days.

Wodehouse opened another world for me – a world of chivalry, and of modern day knights in shining armour. A magical world, where all was sunshine, where bees buzzed and birds chirped in the vales of Blandings and other fairytale English castles, under blue skies and cottonwool clouds. A world where “Young Men in Spats” ran off with policemen’s helmets on Boat Race Night (the night of the annual boat race between Oxford and Cambridge, the eternal rivals) and subsequently spent the night in Bosher Street Police Station, sleeping on a cold plank bed, only to be fined ten pounds by the magistrate the next morning accompanied by strong remarks from the bench, such as :

“The prisoner Wooster………”

“No, I say really, that’s a bit thick…..”

“Silence!” says the beak, pounding his gavel, “Ten pounds.”

Of course, Jeeves was there in the courtroom to bail the young master out.

Or if the young “prisoner” has the presence of mind to give a false name and address such as “Edwin Smith of 7, Nasturtium Villas, East Dulwich”, the magistrate after shooting a keen glance at him, says, “In view of the gravity of your offence, Mr. ah…Smith……. I’m inclined to give you fifteen days without the option.”

“No, I say dash it!” says an agitated Pongo (or “Edwin Smith”).

“But,” continues the beak,“Considering your youth, I’m inclined to temper my judgment with leniency.”

“Oh, fine,” says a relieved Pongo.

“Fine is right,” says the beak, “Twenty pounds”, accompanied by much merriment from the gallery.

Wodehouse’s treatment of life in prison was often light hearted, making his books popular among convicts, particularly the inmates of Sing-Sing. On hearing this, Wodehouse remarked in typical irreverent fashion that while he was glad to hear that his books had found favor with convicts, however he would be a much relieved man to learn that normal people also read his books!

In Wodehouse’s magical world, a serious crisis arose when a valuable painting was stolen, or horror of horrors, when The Empress of Blandings, that prize sow who twice won the silver medal in the Fat Pigs class at the Shropshire Agricultural show, goes missing, abducted by machiavellian conspirators (“Pigs Have Wings”).

Of course, alls well that ends well when a Gally (The Hon Galahad Threepwood) finds a solution and not only restores the stolen painting and/or pig to its rightful owners, but also reunites assorted sundered hearts enroute.

In the Wodehousean world, a complicated situation causing despondency and gloom all around is when Bertie finds himself engaged to two desirable girls at the same time, (both of them, in Jeeves’ words, “eminently unsuitable” for him). Bertie lands up in this mess because, being a “Preux Chevalier”, if a damsel re-ignites an old understanding she has with Bertie and announces that she will sacrifice herself and be his, issuing a “Nolle Prosequi” by throwing cold water on the proposal, simply isn’t done, what? And what if two of them say so at the same time? Naturally, Bertie has to accept! The “Code of the Woosters” demands it! Of course, it requires “The Inimitable Jeeves” to extricate the young master from “a wholly undesirable entanglement” (or entanglements in this case).

In Wodehouse’s world, all’s well that always ends well. Every time! There’s never a problem without a solution, never a story without a happy ending.

Wodehouse’s plots were deeply intricate, which belied their apparent simplicity, and brilliantly craft. The good guys always won through, with the bad guys usually coming a cropper in the end.

One of Wodehouse’s favorite quotes is Browning’s:

                                      “The lark’s on the wing,

                                        The snail’s on the thorn,

                                        God’s in His Heaven,

                                        All’s right with the world!”

In Wodehouse’s world, it was always “God’s in His Heaven, all’s right with the world!” It’s impossible to read Wodehouse without imbibing his sense of optimism and positive outlook on life. References to Guardian Angels abound in Wodehouse, and though they sometimes tarry (or else how will we ever have a plot?) they never fail to deliver in the end.

Wodehouse has created a world of sunshine and romance for us, of “Joy in the Morning”. Ah, yes! Romance! What’s a Wodehouse book without a “Damsel in Distress” and her knight in shining armour? Of course, one or both of them are penniless, and of course their union is opposed by a fearsome aunt- a snobbish Lady Constance Keeble or an imposing Aunt Agatha?( “Aunts Aren’t Gentlemen”).  Or without “A Pelican at Blandings” here and an “Uncle Dynamite” there ? Or a “Piccadilly Jim” and a “Pearls, Girls and Monty Bodkin”?

It’s impossible to read Wodehouse and feel depressed- Tony Baggins recommended “everyone should read a Wodehouse book; it would probably cure all the depression in the world!” In Evelyn Waugh’s immortal words, “Mr. Wodehouse’s idyllic world can never stale. He will continue to release future generations from a captivity that may be more irksome than our own. He has created a world for us to live in and delight in

(These words graced the back covers of Penguin editions of Wodehouse’s books).

Wodehouse’s irreverent attitude often extended to his description of himself. One can well imagine the following conversation taking place between Bertie and Jeeves:

“Er…….Jeeves”

“Yes, sir?”

“This bloke Wodehouse……”

“I believe his writings give uniform satisfaction, sir.”

“What a man, Jeeves! Those characterizations……..those intricate plots……..those fairytale settings ….those perfect endings. The boys at the Drones were raving about him.”

“He was described as the best living writer of the English language during his lifetime, sir”

“A sound egg, what?”

“I could not have expressed it better, sir”

“A jolly contented egg this Wodehouse, Jeeves?”

“Sir?” said Jeeves  frigidly, his right eyebrow rising one-eighth of an inch, which occurred when he was most disturbed.

“Er….Jeeves, what I meant was Mr Wodehouse had to be a content man to produce such ripping novels”.

“While I tend to agree with the general theme of your remarks, sir, I would scarcely take the liberty of describing so great a writer in such a flippant manner.”

“Er…….Jeeves. Perhaps I was unduly flippant.”

“Yes, sir,”

“Umm……Jeeves…you know those purple socks of mine which you so disliked?”

“Yes, sir,” said Jeeves.

“You may burn them.”

“Thank you, sir,” said Jeeves

“‘Thank You,  Jeeves’”

                                  

P.S.  I would like to thank Ajay for sending me this delightful guest post on Wodehouse and allowing me to publish it.  Please note - the headline 'Splendid Post, What!' is mine.  Ajay is too humble to be that self-congratulatory. 

This post makes me want to go back and read all of Wodehouse’s books all over again.  A splendid idea, what!