The Simple Life...

(Or how I went from Why Do I Not Have It? to Do I Need It?)

I internalized Suze Orman.

I started meditating. (The book “How God Changes Your Brain” gave me both my motivation and my technique).

I stopped being a nervous Nellie about my future, accepting that the future was hamarey bas ki baat nahi (Hindi for “beyond my control/capacity/competence”).

I channeled stories such as the Farid ud-Din Attar story about King Mahmud and the Beans.

I started tracking my expenses. I found that knowing my average monthly expenditure was within a certain range made me oodles less anxious.

I searched for and read books on downshifting like Your Money or Your Life.

I found out how simply some folks were living (friends and relatives in India) and how happy and content they were. It helped me develop perspective.

I realized that things are not always what they seem. That people who looked better off than me with expensive cars, nice houses, the latest gadgets and who went on fabulous holidays might actually be reeling in debt and have negative net worth.

I also observed how many people who are better off than me fret more than me. This is because though they are rich in externals (the visible accoutrements of a successful life), they are poor in internals (their internal life is messy). Peace and contentment can’t be bought. It is a gift you give yourself. You can be at peace even living in a crowded noisy apartment complex, whereas you can be in a state of turmoil even in the quietest most luxurious and secluded waterfront mansion. I know this sounds like a “sour grapes” rationalization, but I really do fret less than many people who are materially far better off than me.

I discovered “Asteya” and made it one of my goals. Asteya is the discipline of taking from the world only what you need – without greed, excess, or wastage.

I realized that producing something (expression) was more satisfying than owning anything (consumption). 

I observed that more stuff made me less happy rather than more happy – giving me more house cleaning, maintenance and security to worry about.

And finally, I observed what made me happy. They were not things, but experiences. A good conversation. A good read. A walk or talk with a friend. A simple hearty meal. A guest post (hint,hint). A satisfying workout at the gym. Giving and receiving appreciation. Learning something new. My meditations. A fear or weakness conquered. An intellectual puzzle solved. A physical challenge met. And realizing this, I was able to cheerfully and contentedly declare “I’m good!”

P.S.  I owe the phrase "hamarey bas ki  baat nahi" to a well-wisher who left a comment using that phrase on my post Which Household Object Best Symbolizes You?  I am not sure if I am using it right, but many thanks to you, well-wisher.

P.S. 2:  This post is for Aarathi who enjoyed my previous post on Wabi-Sabi.  Aarathi, this is for you.

P.S. 3 Asteya is one of the Yamas of Yoga. Yoga has eight limbs in all, of which Yama is the first (it is Sanskrit for moral discipline), Niyama is the second (it is Sanskrit for moral guidance), and Asana (Sanskrit for body postures) is only the third. If you want a quick introduction to the 8 limbs, you can read about them here. Also, please note that though I have made Asteya one of my goals, I have taken only the first few steps in what appears to be a journey of 1000 miles.  Greed, excess and wastage are very hard to rid oneself of.  But I am on my way by being aware.

P.S. 4: I discovered the Yamas and Niyamas through reading Judith Lasater’s Living Your Yoga: Finding the Spiritual in Everyday Life. I highly recommend this book. 

P.S. 5: If you are interested in the story of King Mahmoud and the Beans, click on this link which takes you to a page containing some of the best stories of Farid ud-Din Attar. Quick note: Farid ud-Din Attar is a classical Sufi author.

P.S. 6:  Below are links to the books mentioned in this post.

P.S. 7:  As always, thanks for reading and wishing you peace and contentment, above all!