Sunday, December 1, 2013

The Element of Improvement and Its Hope for Mastery in Any Area of Our Lives


Sunset Sky by Anna Langova
Have you ever stopped to think how people at the top stay at the top?

Is it because they have gotten far enough, they can comfortably rest on their laurels?

Here’s what Tiger Woods has to say:

“No matter how good you get you can always get better, and that's the exciting part.”

He also said:

“There’s always stuff to work on. You’re never there.”

If improving is a necessary thing - enabling us to hold on to the success we’ve achieved…

improving is also a cool thing…..enabling us to stretch ourselves and reach for more.

When we stretch ourselves, the reward isn’t just the improvement alone, but the satisfaction of knowing we kicked it up a notch. Yeah!

We can improve in every and any area of our lives.

We can also improve throughout our lives.

Each one of us is forever a diamond in the rough.

Because no matter how much we’ve done...and how much better we have gotten at something...and how much experience we have gained...and how much wiser we’ve become...and how much we’ve grown as people, we will always have unfinished business.

Things which are waiting in the wings for us to master.

Songs we haven’t sung.

Words we haven’t spoken.

Words we haven’t written.

Chords we haven't played

Canvases we haven’t filled.

Dishes we haven't cooked.

Strategies and techniques we haven't applied.

Ideas which haven't been born

Lives we haven’t lived.

In my neighborhood, there was a house in terrible shape.

The house was finally sold in a short sale.

The new owners got it for a bargain price and immediately began transforming it.

When they were done, it was unrecognizable as the rundown house it used to be.

Today, it is one of the nicest houses on the block.

Those who did not see the house before it was transformed do not know how it looked before the new owners had done their magic on it.

The transformed house is a great metaphor for life.

No matter how bad (or even how good) our life is, we can transform it.

We can change our lives for the better.

We can make our lives more satisfying and more special and more meaningful.

Growing up in India, home appliances were a luxury.

The idea of having a Eureka water filter or a vacuum cleaner or TV set was something to aspire to.

When television came to our city, my sister Rosie and I put our money together to buy our family our first TV. 

It was a small black and white TV, but I still remember the pride with which we brought it home and the delight on our parent’s faces.

Later on, I would feel the same pride when I was able to buy my first vacuum cleaner, my first water filter and my first computer.

I have a friend who is from a successful and comfortably well-off family and stands to inherit wealth and property from her parents.

When Tanita was young, I expressed the hope that I should be able to provide for Tanita like my friend’s parents have for her.

But when I shared this with my friend, her reaction was not what I expected.

My friend said no matter how much she stood to inherit from her parents, it would never compensate for her being able build a comfortable life through her own accomplishments. She said it was important for Tanita to be allowed to experience the satisfaction of making a good life for herself.

True to her word, my friend is living by the advice she gave me. She is a self- made woman and has gone from strength to strength in her life. She is definitely someone Sheryl Sandberg and other Lean In advocates would approve of.

One of the things every wealthy parent wants to do is to grow the silver spoon their child was born with.

They think if they do that, they can provide for every event in their child’s life.

This is well-meaning but misplaced.

Because as my friend said, every human being needs to experience the fulfillment that comes from her or his own individual accomplishments.

Besides, it’s impossible to plan for and provide for every eventuality in our children’s lives.

There are just too many variables. Also, there will come a time when they won’t have us to turn to.

Will our children hit bumps in the road?

Sure, they will.

Will they be able to deal with those bumps in the road?

Sure they will.

Will they survive those bumps in the road and come out stronger - just like we did.

Sure they will.

We should, instead, help our children build their survival skills - their judgment, grit, courage, their ability to be street smart, to make good decisions and their ability to improve themselves.

This would be of far more value.

This is how we can improve their chances for a good future.

By modeling the right behaviors for them, sharing our thinking with them, and equipping them to make the right choices.

If we are to model the right behaviors for our children, we should demonstrate a lifelong willingness to learn, to improve and to grow.

Whether utilizing our gifts, pursuing our interests, conquering weaknesses and limitations, bouncing back from setbacks, or developing our minds and bodies, they are looking to us for example.

So let’s be passionate life-long learners.

Let’s become better at cooking, at gardening, at painting, at writing, at all the different things that make up our lives.

Let’s make the most of our abilities and skills.

Let’s overcome our limitations and improve as people, as parents, as children, as friends.

Let’s improve by conquering our fears.

For instance, one of the areas in which we all have a great fear and therefore find it hard to improve is public speaking.

All we have to do is find a Toastmasters club next to us – and we can be on our way to this improvement.

When I joined Toastmasters, I never dreamed I could go on to win awards for speaking, but that’s exactly what happened, as I relate in my post How I Lost a Thousand Dollars On Donuts.

Toastmasters is an inexpensive, convenient and effective way to improve our ability to express ourselves.

Turning Downtime Into Uptime

One of the things that lends itself to improvement is idle time.

Idle time can be life changing.

It can produce the song you’ve never sung.

The symphony you’ve never played.

The poetry you’ve never penned.

During idle time, you are an artist with a blank canvas.

You can fill it with new colors, new textures, new patterns, you can focus on new subjects.

Your imagination is at its most fertile during idle time.

So any seeds you plant are likely to germinate.

When these seeds germinate, it will bring new things to life in your life.

Suddenly you've learned a new language, you are writing a blog, you've taken up gardening or cooking, you've learned meditation, you are pursuing new hobbies, you are volunteering.

We should try to think of things we can do which will challenge us, or put a smile on someone’s face, or put confidence in someone’s step.

I believe great things can come out of idle time – as my post The Element of the Creative Pause and Its Hope for Turning Us Into Idea-Generating Machines indicates. I learned to meditate and started this blog during a spell of idle time.

Start Small. Think Big.

Remember, improvement is not a One Shot Hit The Jackpot kind of thing.

In absolutely any sphere of life, when we start, we are not going to be that great.

We will have to start small.

But it doesn't mean we can't think big.

Because when we do something again and again, as sure as the sun rises in the east and sets in the west, improvement happens.

Improvement is Not the Same As Change

Change for change’s sake is pointless.

Change per se means nothing.

We can change for the better.

We can change for the worse.

Only change for the better is good.

We should aim to change for the better, aiming to improve as people, as a company, as a member of a community, as a society, as a polity, as a country and as human beings.

Why should we change?

Because as Edward de Bono said: “We may have a perfectly adequate way of doing something, but that does not mean there cannot be a better way.” 

The First Step

Every improvement starts by taking the first step.

If you need inspiration to take the first step, read my post The Element of the First Steps and Its Hope for Getting Big Things Started in Our Lives.

Finally, old or young, we should improve things which cannot be taken away from us.

Nobody can take away any of the following from us:

Our skills

Our inner strength

Our devotion

Our ability to generate ideas 

Our hope

Our imagination

Our faith

Our memories

Our courage

Our good humor

Our grit

Our discipline

Our determination

Our knowledge

Our humanity

In the example of the improved house at the beginning of this post, no one can take away the satisfaction of knowing how we improved that house and nobody can take away the beautiful memories created there either – even were we to lose the house because of some unfortunate situation.

Improvement begins with I.

As Arnold H Glasgow said "Improvement begins with an I."

What can you start improving today?

What improvement can you make to create a better life for yourself, or to create a better world?

We, each one of us, can make it happen.

We are where it all begins.

Say "Aye".  Or better still, say "I".

As always thanks for reading and have a great day and week….M…..a Pearl-Seeker like you.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Great Post Minoo! You are like a beacon of hope to your readers, setting out a detailed blueprint on achieving a fulfilling, meaningful life on the way to achieve greatness...