How can a young person with big dreams stay disciplined, focused, and hopeful when life keeps presenting obstacles?

See problems as obstacles to be solved.

Minoo Jha

 · 6y

What should you expect from your life?

Hi, You asked, What are some things that are expected in life? Problems are to be expected in life. How you handle your problems is key to living a good life. Here’s my advice… See problems as puzzles to be solved. Don't see problems as something to ignore. Nor should you see problems as something to complain about, moan and groan about, or to throw money, emotional energy, angst and sleepless nights, fretting and fuming at. If you want to live a better life, start seeing all problems as puzzles to be solved, rather than monsters over which you have no control. Learn to ask questions. Learn to seek solutions. Learn to put on your thinking hat, and tackle the problem. Don't let it grow and become a bigger problem. You should do this, even if you find the problem embarrassing. Don't suffer in private, because you can't risk someone knowing you have a problem. Don't let the problem get worse and worse in secret. Don't let a small problem grow into a giant problem. Get help as soon as you can. Find out who can help you. Find out what steps you can take. Find out how others have overcome the problem. You can be too private for your own good. When I first got depressed, I decided to stay quiet about it. I didn't want to risk my image. Everyone thought I was a person who had it all. I didn't want to blow this image. I wanted keep my image intact. It was such that my image mattered more than the truth. My image mattered more than my suffering. My image mattered more than the reality of my life. The reality was I was not myself emotionally. I was waking up every morning and bursting into tears. But I didn't want anyone to know that. I couldn't bear the idea. All I cared about was “my image”. My image was that of a “successful advertising consultant who had it all - money, success, a happy marriage.” On the whisper circuit, I was rumored to be "the best paid advertising copywriter in the city". I desperately wanted to keep the image going. Even at the risk of becoming more and more of a basket case. I kept my depression secret for months. I hoped it would just vanish. It had mysteriously come on. I hoped it would just as mysteriously go away. Except…it didn't. I finally picked up the courage to speak up and tell someone. One that day, as usual I got up in the morning and burst into tears. But on this day, I called a friend and told her. I said, "……(her name), I don't know what is happening. Every morning I wake up and start crying." She said, "It's a clinical depression, Minoo. I had it some years ago". "I will give you the name and phone number of a psychiatrist," she added. I shuddered at the words "psychiatrist". There are some problems no one likes to admit to - a financial problem, an addiction problem, a hoarding problem, an embarrassing cosmetic problem, a weight problem, sexually related illnesses, a marital problem. A mental health problem is in that category. It is hard to admit to. But I was relieved after I spoke up. The very first person I talked to had been through what I was going through, and was able to point me in the direction of a solution. You know how my depression story turned out. I covered it in a post I wrote a few posts ago on my blog, and in my post If Life Is So Good, Why Do I Feel So Sad? I was successfully able to resolve it and get past it. How can anything be solved if you keep it under wraps? Whatever the problem, you have a better chance if you seek help and look for solutions. You should look at every problem in your life as a puzzle to be solved. By seeking answers and solutions, ideas will come to you, and you will discover things you can try. So here’s what you do when problems arise in your life… You would be wise not to ignore it. You would be wise not to minimize it. You would be wise not to let it whirl around and around in your head, without doing anything about it. Even if you are uncomfortable - you need to talk about it, and get some inputs and strategies. Find someone and share your problem with them. The worst that will happen is they will say they can't help – because they don't have any expertise or resources in that area. But they may point you to people and resources that can be of help to you. You may need professional help, like I did. So take out a piece of paper. First thing you should do is write down what your problem is. Then make a list of the things you can do about it. Make a list of people you can talk to, and other ways to get information. And after you have talked to people, and done your research, pick a solution and start putting it to work. If the first solution doesn't work, try another. If that doesn't work, try another. This is how, sooner or later, you will make strides towards resolving your problem. Even problems you have had for years and years. A friend of mine told me what inspired her to become so interested in, and inspired by, nutrition. She had eczema as a child. Her parents had taken her to doctor after doctor, and they had tried treatment after treatment. Nothing worked. When she was in her early twenties, she decided to radically change her diet. She started eating raw foods instead of processed foods. Her eczema went away. Her eczema had been a constant companion all of her childhood and teenage years, but she was able to find a solution in her 20s. So even if a problem has been a constant companion all your life - you know my advice… See it as a puzzle to be solved. So, in conclusion, problems are to be expected in life, but if you see them as puzzles to be solved, rather than something to moan and groan about, you will be a victor rather than a victim, a hero rather than a drama king or drama queen.

Make sure your goals are personal. Don’t have generic goals.

Minoo Jha

 · 4y

If you know several successful people, what is something that they all have in common?

They all understand that success is personal… All of us are unique. One size doesn't fit all. Not only do we have different geographical backgrounds, we come from different families and cultures. Our genetic and environmental make up is different. What each one of us was exposed to as children, was different. We have had different kinds of schooling. We've been raised in different kinds of families and homes. We've been part of different communities and cultures. Because we spent our childhoods doing different things, and facing different circumstances, we grew up learning different lessons. We grew up absorbing different values. Naturally, the options we think we have are different. The things we are willing to do are different. The things we are able to do are different. We have different fears and concerns. We have different interests and drives. We have different goals and priorities. Quite naturally, the challenges we feel we are up to taking on, will also be different. For all these reasons, it's important for each of us to develop a personal definition of success. This definition should be valid for you, and you alone. I had a rough childhood, where I rarely got a good night's sleep, because my dad had a drinking problem and would be up all night creating scenes. So part of my definition of success is a good night's sleep. Your unique background, your unique education, your unique experiences and experiments, your unique circumstances, and of course your unique dreams and talents, should all figure in crafting your definition of success. Is it that you were the only one to blaze a trail in your family? Is it that you got through your teenage and early adult years without messing up your life? Is it that you have been able to go with the flow, and make a living taking on different challenges? Is it that whatever you touch, you have always made your investment of time, money, and energy pay off? Is it that you have been able to achieve some things that are important to you, such as work flexibility, or work-life balance, or good health? Is it that you have been able to live simply? Is it that you have been able to go from strength to strength in your field? Is it that you have never let a disabling illness or condition stop you from doing the things you want to do? Is it that you have reinvented yourself through different jobs? Is it that, no matter the life blows, you have never lost your faith in God or humankind, or yourself? Is it that you have made some tough sacrifices you never thought you would make? It is that you are a good friend, a good parent, a good child, or a good brother or sister? Is it that you have never let failures and setbacks keep you down? Is it that you have been steadily able to command more and more respect as a person? Success to you may be succeeding in a field where you are a minority. Success to you may be knowing you have conquered some fears or weaknesses to become a better, or stronger person. Success to you may be dealing with a tough situation, without going to pieces, or losing your compassion. You don't have to let other people's definitions of success determine your life. You know who you are. You know what you have been able to do. Most important of all, you know what still remains to be done. Here’s someone who has his own unique definition of success:

Don’t let overconfidence make you skip important steps like having a plan b, and a plan c.

Minoo Jha

 · 6y

Why is it bad to be overly confident?

Hi Bambi, You asked, Why is it bad to be overly confident? Here are some reasons: * You will not do any further research because you think there is no need to * You will not do any extra preparation or training * You will not have a Plan B * Over confidence and lack of humility are 2 sides of the same coin. If you lack humility, that alone can spoil your chances. Let me tell you a story: When I moved to America, because of the high professional status I had achieved in India in the advertising field, I was overly confident. I blew several interviews because of this. When I went to my first (and only) advertising copy interview at a San Francisco agency, I talked more than I listened, and I went way over time. Not only did I not get the job, but just before the interview concluded, the interviewer said, “You are not what we are looking for currently. And also, let me give you some advice for future interviews. This was supposed to be a 1 hour interview. You just went on and on, with no respect for time. I blew my only advertising copy interview. Then I started applying to Admin Assistant jobs. In the first few interviews, because of overconfidence, I presented myself as God’s gift to mankind. I was so self-absorbed in those days, I didn’t look for non-verbal cues; if I had, it would have told me the look on the interviewer’s face was shouting, “Is this for real? Could she be more arrogant?” Luckily, I decided to analyze why I was not getting anywhere with my interviews. And I realized my lack of humility was the factor. Soon after this realization, I started approaching my interviews with humility , and I saw results almost immediately. Now I approach every assignment with a service heart and a servant heart. So much better than my previous overly confident approach!

Don’t jump from one thing to another unnecessarily. You won’t succeed unless you persist long enough to succeed.

Minoo Jha

 · 6y

If someone loses at every turn in life, but honestly tries to the best of their capabilities, has that person led a successful life?

Hi, You asked,If someone loses at every turn in life, but honestly tries to the best of their capabilities, has that person led a successful life? Yes, and they should keep trying. A successful life is a “keep trying’ life. I would like to encourage everyone to be as persnickety as garden weeds. Out Persnickety Weed! Don't you sometimes wonder - We struggle to keep precious animals like the giant panda, the gazelle, the African rhinoceros and the Indian tiger from becoming extinct. Yet weeds, household pests, crop pests, bacteria and viruses continue to flourish. In spite of our burning desire to wipe them off the face of the earth. And all the technology and laboratory chemistry we bring to bear. Is there a lesson here? An Aha Moment, Or What? Maybe our inspiration to achieve our dreams, or keep going when times get tough... Should come... Not from the fragile flowers which bloom for a while, and then fade. All the while, needing the perfect blend of water, sun and soil. But from the weeds that... Against all odds... ...thrive and survive. Here then are the lessons to be learned from the never-say-die weed. Fear not the enemy's might Or did David get inspired by the weed when he went up against Goliath? Every year, it's the same story in gardens and farmland across the world. A huge amount of ammunition is deployed to banish weeds . Weed wackers and weed killers of every kind. Each new invention with more vanquishing power than the last. But, as faithful as the sunrise, the weeds come up again. They fear not the enemy's might. And know they can overtake anything and everything. David and Goliath Which makes you wonder - Did David get inspired by the weed when he decided to take on Goliath? Who would go up against a barbaric 9 foot giant with just a catapult (English for lance-pierres)? You can read the story of David's great leap of faith, here. And then you can meditate on the humble weed. I'm just saying. If at first you don't succeed, try, try again Or did Colonel Sanders get inspired by the weed? You've probably heard the saying - "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again." It was written by an 18th century American educator. By the name of Thomas Palmer. Thomas Palmer wrote this line in a book he called Teacher's Manual. You can take a peek at Teacher's Manual on Google books here. Col. Sanders and Kentucky Fried Chicken If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Is this what Colonel Sanders, founder of Kentucky Fried Chicken, repeated to himself? As he went from restaurant to restaurant to find a taker for his fried chicken idea. He didn't have any luck until he met the 1009th restaurateur. What kept him going? How could you possibly emulate that kind of persistence? Do you wake up every day with amnesia like the girl in the Adam Sandler movie 50 First Dates? Amnesia would be helpful! Or do you pluck a weed from your garden and say - "Hmmm....I'm not going to give up just yet. I am going to persist like this weed... ...look how unfailingly it comes up. In spite of everything! I wonder whether Col. Sanders..." I'm just saying. Everything You Need To Succeed Is Inside Of You Or did Mahatma Gandhi get inspired by the weed? Do you know the story of how India won its independence from the British Raj? It was due in no small measure to a man called Gandhi. Dressed in nothing but a loin-cloth, and armed with only the novel idea of peaceful non-cooperation, Gandhi led his countrymen and country women in peaceful marches and peaceful boycotts against British rule. Until they capitulated in 1947. Walk In Gandhi's Footsteps Gandhi has been a role model and inspiration to those who seek justice or freedom ever since. Martin Luther King and Nelson Mandela, among others. The personal lesson we can take from Gandhi, (which by the way is breath-takingly captured in the 1982 Richard Attenborough Oscar-sweeping film of the same title) is this... ...we have everything we need to succeed within ourselves. We just have to look for it. Which brings me back to the weed. And how nothing will stop it. Not absence of sunshine. Lack of water. Poor soil conditions. Or inhospitable temperatures. It contains everything it needs for its victory within itself. So if you want to channel Gandhi, or Col. Sanders or King David... ...is the way to do it to meditate on the humble, hardy weed? I will leave you with that thought!

Finally, realize that everyone has problems. What you see is not everything. You don't know what problems other young people are facing.

So keep going.

And going.

And going.

And gaining insights and answers as you go along

Wishing  every young hopeful, (and old hopeful), the very best for 2026.