Why are good habits so hard to create?
Hi, You asked, Are good habits difficult to develop? I have written a post about this before on my blog. Reprinting it here because it is relevant. The 15 Laws of Habits 1.It's easier to start a new habit than to give up an old habit. You can see all the habits people find hard to give up – smoking, drinking, doing drugs, playing video games, criticizing. Knowing that, you should steer clear of them. And if you are already into any of them, get out as fast as you can. 2.The company you keep, the places you hang out at, and where you source your information and advice from is key to picking up habits. Spend time at bars, you are likely to drink, spend time with video game players, you are likely to play video games a lot. Join a book club or a walking group, and you will read books and walk more. Learn to discern. 3.To develop a new habit, you have to take the first step. If you’ve never been to a gym, you have to sign up and go. 4.There are alternatives to many habits. For example, therapy, exercise, meditation, yoga and sleep can be an alternative to prescription medicine for stress and insomnia. Low carb diets, intermittent fasting and weight loss programs can be an alternative to metformin and glucophage for diabetes. 5.Alternatives that do not work when you first try them may well work when you try them later. I tried to meditate several times in my life starting from my 20s, but I succeeded later in life. 6.It is okay to be nervous about a new habit. Some new habits are more nerve-wracking than others. Driving is nerve-wracking in the beginning. Public speaking is nerve wracking in the beginning. Understand that many things which are nerve-wracking become less and less nerve wracking as you develop confidence and do it again and again. This was true for me with learning Excel when I switched from an advertising copy career to a commissions administration career. It was also true for me when I learned driving and I learned public speaking, just to name a few areas of my life which were nerve wracking. 7.Besides being nerve-wracking, everything is tough in the beginning. Remember how tough it was for you to learn to ride a bicycle. Or to learn to swim, or to skate, or to golf. What’s tough in the beginning, gets easier as you become habituated to it. 8.People ask me, “Minoo, how do you write and publish a blog post every week?” The answer is: I have been at it for 8 years and more than 450 posts. So I have gotten better and better at both coming up with ideas and writing. People also ask me, “Minoo, how come it is so easy for you to meditate?” The answer is: I have been meditating for the past 8 years. The more you do something, the better you get at it. Take a page out of my book. Better still, take a page out of your favorite athlete’s book – keep doing something, and you will get better and better and better and better and better at it. 9.There are tools to give up habits. If you have a spending problem, you can create an expense tracker and track all your expenses. If you have a hard time being on time, you can use the alarm on your phone, or set your clock back so you are always on time. If you have an addiction, you can join AA. If you have been unsuccessful in giving up a habit without tools, then there's no question about it - you need to use tools. Do not resist this or procrastinate on this. 10.A habit can be liberating. A regular exercise habit liberates you from gaining weight and being less healthy than you want to be. A reading habit liberates you from boredom and ignorance. A purposeful writing habit or community service habit can liberate you from the "now what" feeling that happens after you achieve any milestone. 11.Some habits you should take up just because they are character building. I have a friend who regularly cleans the bathrooms of the Buddhist temple she goes to. This is an example of a character-building habit. 12.It is easier to give up a bad habit if it is inconvenient for you to continue it. I once met a person who told me she used to smoke when she lived in India, but she gave it up soon after coming to America, because she did not like to have to go outside to smoke. If you want to give up a habit, make it inconvenient for you to continue it. For example, if you want to give up alcohol, live far from a liquor store, avoid social events where liquor is served, and avoid people who enable your addiction. Make it inconvenient. If you want to give up cakes and ice-cream and anything else that’s bad for you, don’t stock it at home and if you know it's going to be served at a party, eat before you go to the party. You will have an easier time of giving up an unhealthy eating habit this way. Do you know after I went low-carb, I stopped buying potatoes and rice and bread altogether. Take a leaf out of my book. 13.Repetition is the key determinant of success with new habits. You have to take the first step. Then you have to do it again. Then you have to do it again. Then you have to do it again. Then you have to do it again. People who excel at things often do so only after they have been at it for 10,000 hours. Repetition is essential and it is powerful and rewarding. 14.Good habits lead to great habits. The more you exercise, the more you can exercise. The further you can go. And the more challenging things you can attempt. In yoga - you may find yourself starting with the easy Lotus pose and eventually being able to do the difficult crane pose. The 2 mile walker becomes the 5 mile walker. The 5 mile walker becomes the 10 mile walker. The 10 mile walker becomes the 13.1 mile walker. The 13.1 mile walker becomes the 26.2 mile walker. 15.Finally, we become associated with our habits. Depending on when and how you know me, you will associate me with this blog, or with the Fiesta advertising campaign I created, or with wearing sweaters in the Chennai heat, or with wearing sunshades at night, or with drinking till I passed out, or with playing my own compositions on the guitar. For your information, of the above, this blog is the only habit which still stands. Hope this answer inspires you to give up any habits that are bad for you. And more importantly, to succeed in developing new habits to replace them, which are good for you.
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