Oh! Bangalore! - Part II

In Oh! Bangalore! (Part 1 of this series), Ajay took us on a fascinating time-travel trip into Bangalore's past. Fasten your seat belts and get ready to journey with him through modern Bangalore in Oh! Bangalore! - Part 2.

Sundance Short-Stay Service Apartments - Perfect for Exploring Modern Bangalore

                                 
                      Oh! Bangalore - Part II  
                By Ajay Sachdev  (midasinvone@yahoo.co.in) 
I was back home and relaxing with my favorite PG Wodehouse book when I heard a voice speaking to me - “Get up Ajay! You have much to do.”

Was it the Angel again? Or my brother playing a prank on me? Or a friend? No one around....I shrugged , prepared to delve back into the misadventures of Bertie Wooster and his  gentleman’s personal gentleman, Reginald Jeeves, of “Uncle Fred in the Springtime” and of “Young Men in Spats” fame, when a tingle of static electricity went through me and I felt the same overwhelming presence. An all encompassing feeling of excitement swept over me.

“Get up Ajay,” the voice gently repeated, “You have only begun your odyssey.”  

Suddenly, the hum was back in the room....the room shook about its axis, and everything blurred. The air parted once more, revealing the gaping time warp in the center of the room.

Confidently, I stepped through and it promptly closed up behind me. I waited expectantly. What wonderful adventures lay ahead of me? Where was the horse and chariot? The sound of hooves? I listened with a hand cupped to one ear...nothing. Expectantly, I looked around. Then I began to feel a slight movement as the air around me began to swirl, until it became a rushing sound. With a screech of brakes, a shiny futuristic blue car that was like no car I had ever seen before skidded to stop in front of me, and the door swung open.  I felt a strong urge to get inside, so I did, and as if on cue, the door clicked shut. The car began to move slowly at first and then gathering speed, I felt it rising higher and higher. The familiar digital LCD screen suddenly popped up in front of me. As in the Golden Chariot, there were no controls in the car, no steering wheel, and no brakes.  No brakes? I frowned, as I looked around...suppose we crashed? Just then, a warm feeling of reassurance enveloped me. Reassured that I was safe, I sat back waiting for my amazing adventure to continue...

                         The Ghost of Bangalore Present

The digital meter read 2011, so I guessed we were going to voyage through Bangalore Present. But then, why did I need a time traveler, I asked myself? After all, I was in ‘Bangalore Present’ and could travel through the city on my own. As if reading my thoughts, a soft voice caressed my ear. “Ajay, do you know how big Bangalore is? It’s spread across 741 sq kilometers (460 miles). Do you know how long it will take you to cover it on your own?  It’s far better we do things my way........”

“Yes sir!”  I said enthusiastically as my body tingled with the familiar feeling of static electricity, whenever the angel came close to me.

What’s that below me?  It’s the MG Road boulevard - a large concrete gash runs on its left side:  it has been torn up to make way for the upcoming elevated Metro Rail, and the historic ‘Plaza Theatre’ on its right has been torn down for a metro station.  I frowned at the wanton destruction of historic landmarks.  But then the government has promised to restore the boulevard after the metro is complete. 

Full of nostalgia, I looked around for Bangalore’s other lovely English movie theaters– only the ‘Rex’ still stands in its original form – ‘Bluemoon’ and ‘Bluediamond’ (where the movie ‘ABBA’ ran for 25 whole weeks), ‘Galaxy’ and ‘Imperial’ have made way for commercial complexes. I remembered nostalgically the frenzy “Enter the Dragon” created when it ran at the ‘Galaxy’ for 60 whole weeks! – a record for an English film in Bangalore. I have fond memories of the “Imperial” theater which screened the classic Peter Sellers movie “The Party” and Readers Digest’s musical “Tom Sawyer” and of the ‘Lido’ which ran a succession of James Bond movies. It has now metamorphosed into a multiplex with several theaters and a commercial complex with the regulation food court.  I distinctly remember the sensation ‘The Spy Who Loved Me’ created at the ‘Lido’, notching up a silver jubilee.  I recall two auto drivers coming out of the theater discussing the movie amongst themselves “kyun je – scooter pani me chalata hai je!” (“What man! He’s driving a scooter in the water!”)

     ‘Enough of movies’, the car seemed to say, as it sped away to the sprawling campuses of the software giants headquartered in Bangalore. How they’ve changed the face of Bangalore – from a sleepy pensioners paradise to the third most populous city in India, and one among a select group of global cities alongside Dallas, Miami, Boston, Kuwait City, Lima, Brasilia and Munich. The IT professionals - who man the IT Industry in Bangalore, with their high disposable incomes, have changed the face of Bangalore - making real estate prices zoom to the stratosphere. They’ve also spawned quite a pub culture in Bangalore.

     The car then zoomed to Bangalore’s famous malls; there’s the Forum Mall in Koramangala, taking Bangalore by storm when it first opened, with its glitzy shops, multilevel parking and a first time Food Court, besides Bangalore’s very first multiplex.  That the multiplex - the PVR Cinemas - succeeded in jacking up movie ticket rates to astronomical levels is another story altogether.The Forum was quickly followed by the Garuda Mall, off Brigade Road, and Mantri Mall in Malleswaram, both with Food Courts. Garuda with its multiplex, continues to be immensely popular to this day.  In the evenings, the malls are filled with shoppers, moviegoers, snackers, or people just hanging out to have a good time.

    Let’s look at the food scene, the car seemed to say.  Gosh!  There are so many restaurants in Bangalore!  From Fine Dining to Casual and Fast Food, from Italian to French, from Chinese to Korean to Thai to Iranian to North Indian to South Indian, from Oriya to Punjabi to Vietnamese to Japanese.....drool! You name it...there’s a dedicated restaurant for each cuisine in Bangalore.  Of course, the old faithfuls such as  ‘Koshys’, Tiffany’s, “Casa Piccola’,  ‘MTR’ ,  ‘Woodlands’ and Vidyarthi Bhawan continue to serve up their gastronomic delights to this day. Budget foods?  There are the ever present darshinis and Udupi restaurants at virtually every street corner.....economical, fast South Indian and North Indian food in a jiffy; not to mention the dhabas on major highways offering classical truck-stop food. Bangalore is truly a gastronomic paradise, and a gourmet’s Holy Grail!

    The car suddenly spun away from the gastronomic scene. Where was I going now?  Wow! There’s “Fun World” below me, Bangalore’s premier amusement park in the heart of the city with several heart stopping rides, a toy train, bumper cars, and a video game gallery.  It has a Water World section too, a recent addition, where children and adults can enjoy several thrilling water rides.

     And Oh! There’s the ultra modern amusement park “Wonder La’ on the outskirts of Bangalore at Bidadi - with several breathtaking and super-fun rides.  A day at Wonder La makes your wanna go there again and again!

    The car suddenly pulled up high above Bangalore, with a whoosh!  -  it was a little like going up in a high speed elevator: you know you are up there, but your insides have been left behind!  I had a glorious overview of Bangalore. Underneath me was a pulsating city full of life and drive; with ultra modern shopping centers, the latest glitzy cars, movie multiplexes, a thriving IT industry and an upcoming biotech industry.....in short the tech capital of India, perhaps of the continent, and who knows, one day of the world!

    What’s that? Gosh!  It’s my editor Minoo, frowning and tapping her feet impatiently, looking at her watch - I’m long overdue ...way past my deadline, and as if the Angel had read my the thoughts, the car suddenly vanished and I felt myself slipping, falling through time and space, until I fell back through the time warp and into my chair with a soft ‘plop’.

     With a strong sense of ‘déjà vu’, I looked around for the Angel and the sleek car. What model was it?  I couldn’t recall..... my memory faded and my eye fell on my computer.  Aha! I told myself....there’s work to do.  I fed paper in the printer and began typing....

   

     So dosvidanya , dear reader.......until next week!

P.S. Terrific tour of present-day Bangalore, Ajay. I was spell-bound - everything was so new to me. Will be counting the days to Oh! Bangalore! - Part III due next Saturday, with the enthusiasm of a teenager waiting for the follow-ups to Twilight, New Moon and Eclipse. You are probably busy with your time-travels of Future Bangalore as we speak.

P.S. 2: Aarathi, Uday, Deepa....looking forward to lively comments from you and other readers who are amazed by what a terrific writer and a love for Bangalore can do.

P.S. 3: While we are on the subject of Bangalore, you may want to check out Things that remind me of my childhood - India in the 80's and 90's - a panoramic Pinterest board of Divya Silbermann and help her add to it.

P.S. 4: As always, thanks for reading.

Oh! Bangalore!

South Parade -  courtesy www.discoverbangalore.com

                                           

By Ajay Sachdev  (midasinvone@yahoo.co.in)                 

‘Twas the winter of ’75. I was walking down Bangalore’s lovely MG Road Boulevard, formerly called South Parade, when there was a brilliant flash of light. Confused, I sat down on one of the charming Olde Worlde benches that lined the promenade. A misty cloud enveloped me. An angelic being caught my hand and took me to a lovely place of unbelievable beauty, full of the most amazing music.

“Who are you...and where am I?”  I asked blissfully, but nervously.

The angel gave me one of the most beautiful smiles I had ever seen, full of love and warmth, and said, “Ajay, I am The Spirit of Bangalore...and as to why you’re here, I want you to write about Bangalore, its past, present and future. Again the angel gave me that wonderful smile.

“Why, I’m honored,” I said hesitatingly, “But, why me? There are so many writers far, far better than I am...”

“Well, Ajay,” said the angel, “It’s because you truly love Bangalore...”

Suddenly, there was a ‘whoosh’ with smoke everywhere. Everything spun around me, and with a ‘thump’, I landed back on the rustic green bench. I looked around perplexed...where was the angel? Was it all a dream? A touch of the sun? Did I imagine it all? Life was logical...I must have...but that wonderful warm feeling which still enveloped me, told me I didn’t. It was real and it was true!

Back home, I rolled up my sleeves; and with pen and paper in hand, set to work, waiting for the muse to strike. How would I begin? FLASH! An inspiration hit me! I decided that I would split the article up into three parts, since just one part wasn’t sufficient to do justice to the city of Bangalore.

Now, where on earth would I get my material? Should I make a round of all the libraries? Do some serious research through history books? Should I interview some old timers and get their recollections on Olde Bangalore? My thoughts drifted off......how nice it would be if I could actually travel back through time and see Bangalore through the ages...Suddenly, there was a humming noise and the room seemed to shake on its axis. A mist rolled in, and the fabric of the room parted, leaving a gaping hole right in the middle. Unsettled, I asked myself what was happening? This couldn’t be real...after all life was logical. Then suddenly I felt that same warm glow enveloping me as before, and I felt a strong urge to enter the opening. I hesitated, like the cat in the adage, “letting I dare not wait upon I would!” 

 A soft voice caressed my ear, “Go in, Ajay!  It is meant for you. I’ll be with you every step of the way!”       

Reassured, I took the plunge. No sooner had I stepped in, than the opening promptly closed behind me. Desperately, I looked around for something...what had I let myself in for?                    

I looked around the new place. It was different. There was no sun, no sky...but a warm light all around. It was neither too bright nor too dim...in other words, it was just perfect!  Where did it come from? Just then, I heard the clippety clop, clippety clop of hooves in the distance, which became louder and louder until a golden chariot pulled up opposite me, drawn by two of the finest Arabian stallions I’d ever seen. I looked around bewildered...where was the road? I didn’t seem to be standing on any road, neither did the horses or the chariot, but here we were, firmly supported and not falling down.  The door of the chariot swung open...there was no one inside, neither was there a charioteer, but I felt a strong urging to enter, so I did. No sooner did I sit down than the door swung shut and the chariot began to move.

What now? I asked myself, fascinated by the amazing adventure I was going through. Suddenly, a digital screen popped up in front of me ....it was the only modern thingamajig in the entire chariot...and a series of numbers began spinning through it. Until they came to rest at “1010AD,Bangalore”.

Then I got it. The angel had heard me! I was traveling through time!

                                                                                              

                                            Part I

                   The Ghost of Bangalore Past

I looked outside...the climate was cool and pleasant, but then Bangalore, the garden city, has had a salubrious climate since time immemorial, the mercury never dipping below 12 degrees C in winter, and never rising above 37 degrees in summer. A cool breeze blows for most of the year.  Not for nothing is it called the air- conditioned city. Moreover, it never rains too much in Bangalore either – a perfectly moderate climate.

Looking outside, I saw a king dressed in old fashioned royal robes...he looked familiar, I was sure that I had seen him somewhere before. I racked my brains.

Who was that? I knew my history, but I had to struggle to place the face...it was King Veera Balla II.  He appeared lost in a forest. He’s looking tired, and hungry...what’s that?  He’s met an old woman who’s offering him some boiled beans. He looks so grateful. Now he’s laughing and saying “Benda- kaal- uru” which if I know my Kannada means “town of boiled beans”! I suppose that evolved into Bengaluru, which subsequently got anglicized to Bangalore!  So that’s how Bangalore got its name!!!

Then the chariot began moving again until the screen read 1024 AD. Looking outside, I could see a raging battle. Scared, I looked around, but everyone seemed to ignore me and the chariot....it was as if we were invisible….then I got it. We were invisible...the chariot could not be seen by anyone outside. Who were these soldiers? It was the Cholas capturing Bangalore! Then the chariot moved to 1116...and another battle...it was the Hoysalas capturing Bangalore in 1116!

Then the numbers on the screen changed to 1537. Looking outside, I saw a man dressed in an old fashioned costume. He looked so familiar, I was sure that I had seen him somewhere before. I racked my brains again, and then the penny dropped...it was Kempegowda I, a vassal of the Vijaynagar Empire, building modern Bangalore, followed by  Kempegowda II , who built the four towers that marked the boundaries of Olde Bangalore, which survive to this day!

Now it was 1791...all around us were the British, under Lord Cornwallis. Here they are, taking over Bangalore, and ceding administrative control of the old city to the Mysore Royal Family, the Wadiyars, while retaining control of the Cantonment area. (Srikantadatta Narasimharaja Wadiyar to this day remains the Maharaja of Mysore, though not in administrative control). With the British in charge of the Cantonment area, here’s Bangalore developing fast with well laid out townships, neat streets, an organized water supply and efficient drainage. And look! It’s the British, Europeans, Anglo-Indians and missionaries settling down here, lending the Cantonment area its distinctive charm, which it retains to this day. There are the  British laying out three lovely townships, viz Richmond Town, Cleveland Town and Benson Town, which are among the most up market areas in Bangalore today, with property prices in the stratosphere. Here are the British naming the Cantonment roads with military names i.e. Brigade Road, Artillery Road, Infantry Road and Cavalry Road. Gosh!  There’s the charming Plaza Theatre, being constructed in 1936 on South Parade, and being used by soldiers for viewing Hollywood movies. (Sadly, the theatre, where I spent many a happy time, has now been torn down to make way for a metro railway station). There’s the current Raj Bhavan, the Governor’s residence, being occupied by the British Resident. And there’s Lady Curzon Hospital being named after the first wife of the Viceroy of India, Lord Curzon.

Then the chariot moved back in time and brought me to 1868 and Residency Road, where Bangalore Club, one of the oldest and most exclusive clubs in the country is being founded as the Bangalore United Services Club. Are those officers riding horses to the stables there and using its facilities for rest and recreation? (Now, of course, its membership is largely civilian). There’s the Maharaja of Mysore, frequenting the club, and there’s young Winston Churchill at age 22, having a great time at the club. What’s this? He’s decamped from the club, without settling his dues of Rs 13/-? He’s now being declared a defaulter and his name struck off the register! (To this day, his defaulter’s bill is displayed on the notice board of the club house. Prince Charles, during his visit to India, offered to “settle” the bill, which offer was, of course, turned down by the management.)

There are the  illustrious past presidents of the club such as  Col JP Grant, after whom Grant Road is named, Mr. KC Hutchins after whom Hutchins Road is named, Mr.GR Cooke who had the privilege of Cooke Town being named after him, while Mr. LT MacIver lends his name to MacIver Town.. The Cantonment area looks so charming, dotted with British colonial bungalows, almost like a “Little England”! Only a few of these bungalows still stand; most have been torn down to make way for garish office or apartment complexes.

 

The chariot then brought me to my favorite century, the late 20^th century, and two up market restaurants in Olde Bangalore  - “Koshy’s Café” on St Mark’s Road and “Tiffany’s” on Grant Road, (both of which survive to this day, though the Tiffany’s building has been torn down, and Tiffany’s has moved to a commercial complex on Residency Road). What’s that ? It’s my editor Minoo, enjoying the delicious food at Koshy’s, during one of her many visits to that famed café. (Koshy’s food has remained consistent even to this day) Gosh! There’s Koshy’s catering to Her Royal Highness, Queen Elizabeth II, to Marshall Tito, to Jawaharlal Nehru and the staff of 20^th Century Fox during their visits to Bangalore, (as the menu card even today proudly proclaims).

Look, down  there’s the “India Coffee House”, on South Parade (now MG Road), with turbaned waiters serving English fare such as sandwiches, cutlets, finger chips, the most delicious scrambled eggs on toast, orange squash, besides, of course, the strongest South Indian filter coffee known to man, at bargain basement prices, thus ensuring that it’s  always full! . (Alas, like “Tiffany’s”, it has now moved to a nearby commercial complex).

And here’s newly opened “Casa Piccola” on my left, Bangalore’s first Euro Restaurant run by Bhushan Oberoi and his talented Austrian wife, serving up Bangalore’s very first pizzas, burgers and pasta. It’s creating a sensation and is jam-packed, making it a struggle to get through to the savored prize – its lip-smacking, finger lickin’ good food. We’re now in the city area, where the delicious and famous South Indian tiffin rooms, viz the famous Mavalli Tiffin Rooms next to Lalbagh and Vidyarthi Bhavan in Gandhi Bazaar have been newly founded (which survive to this day). It’s 1980 and there’s such a craze for MTR’s dosas and tiffin, that I can see Gujarati families dispatching their drivers to MTR on early Sunday mornings, to pack up the delicious dosas and tiffin, then send them to the airport to hand over the food to fellow travelers going to Ahmedabad with a request to hand them over to their waiting relatives at the Ahmedabad airport, who would then relish the tasty South Indian food in time for breakfast! This is incredible, but true; I’m not making it up!

Parks! Wherever are Bangalore’s fabulous gardens? As if in response to my thoughts, the chariot whirled back to 1760 AD. The evergreen Lalbagh is being laid out by Hyder Ali, with a lake, a pine walkway, a glass house, a lotus pond and 3000 year old peninsular gneiss rocks from the top of which you can see all of Bangalore! The chariot moved again until we reached the year 1870. There’s the famous Cubbon Park being laid out by the British under a different name - Meade’s Park after Sir John Meade (The name Cubbon is yet in the future) Wow! Cars are being allowed inside. Gosh!  Is that a bandstand and the Royal Air Force Band playing western music? And an amazing toy train running later?

I can see my editor, Minoo, glowering at me for the amount of space I’ve taken, so seeking a thousand pardons, I pleaded with the angel to return me to the present.  Suddenly, everything spun once more. With a “whump”, I fell out through the time warp and landed in my chair at home. The warp promptly closed up behind me with the same humming noise.

And so, dear reader, though there’s so much more to say, I’ll sign off now...until the next episode, which tells you, all about “the Ghost of Bangalore Present”!

P.S. Great stuff, Ajay.  Enjoyed this interesting expedition into Bangalore's past in your time-traveler. Can’t wait to read the “The Ghost of Bangalore Present” next Saturday.

P.S. 2: Aarathi, looking forward to your lively comments.

P.S. 3:  If you are planning a trip to Bangalore, bookmark this post and the next 2 posts, and I know just the place for you to stay. It's called Sundance. Check it out.

Time Travel: 5 Easily Solved Questions and One Unsolved One

Question 1:

In which tv series, does a woman fall in love with a Qing dynasty painting, travel back in time and fall in love with several princes. The series provoked a backlash from the Chinese censors, leading to Fox News headlines such as “China Bans Time Travel”.

Question 2:

In which story does a time-traveler from the 19^th century find himself in King Arthur’s court, where he is sentenced to be burned at the stake on June 22, but knowing a solar eclipse will take place on that day, threatens to blot out the sun and is able to escape death. The author is a humorist and even when expressing his political sympathies, comes off like this: “Why, dear me, any kind of royalty, howsoever modified, any kind of aristocracy, howsoever pruned, is rightly an insult; but if you are born and brought up under that sort of arrangement you probably never find it out for yourself, and don't believe it when somebody tells you.”

Question 3:

In which story does a miserly businessman undergo a transformation after traveling to the past, the present and the future in the company of 3 different ghosts? It was Jim Carrey’s first Disney project.

Question 4:

In which story, does a scientist travel 800,000 years into the future in his own time-travelling machine, where he discovers a society which leads him to conclude that intellect and strength are no longer needed for survival. The author, one of the fathers of science fiction, had a dismal view about my former profession and is reported to have said: “Advertising is legalized lying.”

Question 5:

In which story, does a hunter pay to go on a guided safari into the past to kill a Tyrannosaurus Rex, on the promise to his travel guides, he will not veer off the path and cause unintended future consequences. He regretfully veers off the path. The concept of the “The Butterfly Effect” is attributed to this story.

And now for the unsolved question...

Unsolved Question:

What does any of this have to do with “Oh Bangalore!” - a series of upcoming posts by Ajay Sachdev?  

Aha – I’m not telling.  You will have to wait till Saturday to find out.

Mark Your Calendars. 

Oh Bangalore! - a new series of guest posts by Ajay Sachdev begins Saturday.

Illuminations on the path to Zigging like Zig Ziglar

(Or how to write a romba fine, tumba chennagide speech)

If you want to improve your speaking mojo, here are 3 invaluable rules of engagement...

Rule Number 1:

If a romba beautiful picture is in the eye of the beholder, a romba wonderful speech is in the eye of the listener. 

But the listener is not whom you think.

Audience illa.

Are you going Yenaka theriyaad? Enakku puriyala! 

I will explain...

The listener is whoever has requested you to speak.

Your Boss.

The HR Employee Development Coordinator.

The President of the Club.

The Organizer of the Seminar.

The friend who is getting married.

This is the person your speech must aim to please – the same one you will have to profusely apologize to, or make some wild excuses to, if you make any boners.

So the first rule of engagement is to understand the person who has requested the speech. 

Find out what it is they are expecting, and if they have a list of do’s and don’t’s for you. 

Maybe, even run your speech idea (possibly your entire speech) by them.

If they tell you to solpa adjust madi your speech, solpa adjust madi your speech. 

If they stare at you as if you are an alien from another planet, best to throw everything out and start over.

Treat the person who has commissioned you to speak as your touchstone. You won’t regret it.

How Bonita Kraspoler helped me zig like Zig Ziglar

Let me tell you about the time I gave a Money Workshop to the 4^th,5^th and 6^th grade GATE students of Taylor Elementary School.

Unsure about how to present to such young minds, I decided to ask the GATE program coordinator, Bonita Kraspoler, if I could run the presentations by her so she could evaluate them.

She graciously agreed and I went over to her house at the appointed time.

What happened next was not what I predicted.

I thought she would hear my entire speech out and then say something like “fabulous - just shorten the part about taxes”.  In other words, suggest some minor tinkering.

Instead, she suggested a full engine rebore. 

My material was too dry, too academic, too long, and too lacking in interactivity for her liking.

The first presentation was on Earning Money and she kept stopping me mid-sentence and saying “turn that into a question. Let the kids provide the answer. Ask, don’t tell”.

Thanks to her input, I completely overhauled my material and transformed it from a "dry-as-dust lecture" to a “true workshop” -packed with audience participation devices such as quizzes, exhibits and games.

My 3-unit Money Workshop - Earning Money, Spending Money and Saving Money became more palatable and better suited to a young fidgety audience.

Here are some examples of the devices I incorporated:

Example of Show vs. Tell

•  I passed around different forms of money, including notes, coins, a debit card and a credit card and asked the students what each one was.

Example of Do vs. Hear

• We created blank play checks and had each student fill out an individual check so they learned how to do check-writing

• We divided the students into groups, gave them Lucky, Safeway and Nob Hill Weekly Flyers and asked them to select things for a party and add up the dollar amounts of the items selected (the idea was to see who came up with the most economical party)

Example of Ask vs. Tell           

• I told them that at In N Out Burger, they could read on a place mat that In N Out started making burgers in 1948 and a burger cost only 20 cents at that time and today though their burgers cost $1.99, they still make it the same way.  I explained this meant the price of an In N Out Burger had gone up 10 times since 1948. I asked them what percentage of an In N Out burger 20 cents would buy them today.  Several of them quickly worked out the calculation in their heads and shouted 10%. This is how I taught them about inflation.

You can see how useful Bonita’s input was to me.

Warming to the idea of getting your speech requester involved?

Let's move on to Rule No. 2:

Seri...

Focus on your audience, then your topic, so you don’t miss the boat (or the autorickshaw)

Your second rule of engagement should be to focus on your audience first, topic next. Those with an advertising background know this well.

Your speech-requester can be your friend once again.

She/he is likely to have a good handle on the audience you are speaking to.

So you should try to find out as much as you can.

Knowing where your audience is coming from - their background, professional affiliation, reason why they are in the audience that day, can help you tailor both the content and style of your speech to suit them.

Even knowing how tired or energetic they may be when you are scheduled to speak is useful - if you are going on at the end of what has been a grueling day for your audience, it signals to you that you should go easy on the heavy stuff, or yawns, snores and glances at the clock will be your unavoidable fate.

If there is any opportunity to chat and mingle with the audience prior to the speech, seize it.

It will enable you to find out things about your audience, so you can be even more empathetic with them.

An Example of Empathy

-           

• If you find out lunch was served half an hour late, you can commiserate with them about that.

Consider a Dress Rehearsal

If possible, test your speech on someone representative of your audience.

Again, I did this with my Money Workshop.

I sat my daughter Tanita and one of her classmates down a few days before the workshop and did a dress rehearsal with them.

Their reactions and feedback indicated that my first presentation on Earning Money was romba fine, but the Spending Money and Saving Money presentations were less lively and needed more oomph.

Know your audience before you speak to them and you are more likely to communicate effectively with them.

Seri...moving on to Rule No 3:

Of course, most audiences love a joke, but about whom?

While jokes are a great ice-breaker and can really take the edge of a dry topic, you have to be careful your jokes don’t fall flat.

Or worse still, offend.

The best advice is to steer clear of making jokes about any group of people, and especially the group of people you are talking to.  (spouting negative jokes about lawyers to a group of lawyers – noooo, nooooo)

So here’s who you can safely make jokes about -

Yourself.

Your own personal flaws and experiences can provide you with safe material to joke about.

And self-deprecation might even disarm your audience – humanizing you and making you less intimidating to them – especially if they are not listening to your speech out of choice.

Here’s a link with a video explaining how you can use personal experiences (in this case dad and teenager jokes) to liven up a speech.

So there you have it...

3 tips to help you to give a Romba Nalla, Romba Fine, Tumba Chennagide Professional Speech...

And here’s the book in which you will find all these 3 tips and a lot more...

It's called Present Like a Pro. 

Happy Speaking!

P.S.  I had a terrible fear of public speaking.  Then I signed up for Toastmasters at Adlibmasters in San Jose and completed my CTM. It was a big help.  If you have a fear of public speaking, or need to take your speaking to a new level, kavalai padaathey, (don’t worry) Toastmasters can help you. Toastmasters is a worldwide organization and you are sure to find a Toastmasters club close to you. I encourage you to join.  It’s practically free and well worth the time and effort.

P.S. 2: Also, if you need help crafting a speech or brainstorming ideas, I would love to help.

P.S. 3: Finally, I would be happy to reprise my Money Workshop for any school kids that could benefit from it. It would just be a question of dusting off my material and sprucing it up.

P.S. 4:  As always thanks for reading and Intha Nal Iniyia Nal aga irukadum.  I am giving myself a badge of courage for using a few Tamil and Kannada words in this post since I know all of two and a half words in these languages (Shame on you, Minoo).  If the usage is wrong, please feel free to correct me so I make less of a fool of myself in the future.  Nandri.

How To Let Nothing Come Between You And A Fulfilling Life

When you don’t have eyes, use your ears

If you don’t have sight, how full can your life be?

2 words for you:  

Stevie Wonder. 

Blind almost since birth, Stevie never let his blindness become an excuse and followed his dream to become a musician.

If not for that, we might never have heard such wonderful hits as “I Just Called To Say I Love You”, “You are the Sunshine of My Life”, “Boogie On Reggae Woman” and “That’s What Friends Are For”.

Like Stevie, we should never let a physical (or mental) challenge come between us and our dreams. No matter how big that challenge is.

Our talents, energy, resolve and ability to adapt should be able to empower us.

By focusing on what we can do, instead of what we can’t do, we can achieve amazing things.

When you don’t have arms, use your legs

If you are born armless, do you have to sit on the sidelines of life?

Not if you ask George and James, the Dennehy boys. 

Born armless, the Dennehy brothers have not let it hold them back from pursuing music, sports and all the activities their hearts desire.

George learned to play the guitar, cello and electric bass (you can see him perform here), and George and James water-ski and play basketball as well.

Reading their story and you can do so here (you will also learn about Jessica Cox, an armless pilot) will inspire you to overcome any limitations standing between you and your dreams.

Nothing stops us from achieving (or re-achieving our dreams) and becoming all we are meant to be.

Just look at George, James and Jessica.

When you can’t talk, use your fingers

If you are deaf and you can't speak, are you destined to be a spectator in life?

Not if you let Marlee Matlin’s life be your guide. 

Losing her hearing as an 18 month old baby, Marlee did not let this stop her from pursuing an acting career which would ultimately lead her to an Oscar for her performance in Children of a Lesser God.

Debuting at age 7, Marlee is still going strong as an actress after 25 years and has also delighted us with her performances on Dancing With The Stars and with her book, “I’ll Scream Later”, in which we learn that she has also successfully overcome child abuse, drug use and an abusive relationship.

Hard to believe that this truly remarkable gal has achieved so much in life, in spite of being able to speak only with her fingers.

Proving once again...

If we believe we can do it, we can do it.

We should feel empowered by Marlee Matlin’s story to use the gifts we have to triumph over both our physical limitations and our bad choices and experiences.

When you can move only your eyes, move your eyes

If you were paralyzed and could move only your eyes, could you continue to live a productive life?

If you read Charlie Wedemeyer’s story, the answer, hard to believe, is yes.

Struck down with ALS at the young age of 30 - which made him unable to walk, talk or use his hands -this former sportsman, Los Gatos High School teacher and coach continued to coach the Los Gatos High Wildcats football team for a full 9 years after the onset of his illness, using eye blinks, eye twitches and eyebrow raises (which his wife interpreted for him) to communicate with his team. 

Indeed, even after he stopped coaching, though Charlie was still able to only blink his eyes, he lived a full life with ALS, until his death at the age of 64 last year.

The ALS annals are full of heroic stories such as Charlie’s. It includes the story of my dear cousin Vinita Piyaratne (Vantu to me and my family), who has been a personal hero to me for the way she has handled her own ALS illness since she was diagnosed with it 5 years ago. 

What makes Charlie’s and Vantu’s stories so heartening, is their refusal to give up on life.

You can read Vantu’s remarkable story of courage, optimism and cheerfulness in this newspaper article, and in her book: Go Slowly Moon.

I hope you are empowered by the amazing triumphs of Stevie Wonder, George and James Dennehy, Jessica Cox, Marlee Matlin, Charlie Wedemeyer and Vinita Piyaratne to never let anything come between you and a fulfilling life.

P.S. It has been my privilege to learn George and James’s story first hand from their father, Mike Dennehy, whom I worked with at Palm. Bangaloreans may be interested to know that Mike Dennehy’s son James is originally from Bangalore, and his full name is James Karthik Dennehy.

P.S. 2:  Thanks to Ken Crafford of Stratafusion Inc. for bringing Charlie’s story to my attention.  A made for tv movie, Quiet Victory: The Charlie Wedemeyer Story was released in 2005, you can link to it at Netflix here. You can also read the IMDB info for Quiet Victory here.

P.S. 3: ALS is also called Lou Gehrig’s Disease - after the major league baseball player Lou Gehrig, whose career was tragically cut short by it.  Another victim of ALS is the brilliant professor Stephen Hawking. You can read what he has to say about living with ALS here.

P.S. 4: Ever since my dear cousin Vantu was diagnosed with ALS, I have become acutely aware of this illness and expressed to Tanita that it would be wonderful if she became a scientist and helped find a cure for it.

P.S. 5:  I really do believe that thriving is a state of mind, not a state of body, or a state of circumstances.  My own B-I-L Jim, who contributed the guest post Gleanings From The Teaching Company, is a testimony to that. Jim's achievements are so many, I will need to dedicate an entire post to them. Meanwhile, let me know if other heroes come to your mind. Also, my post "How to Be a Better Dad in 2011" contains a video of 2 heroes, a dad and his son.  You can read it here. As always, thanks for reading and hope you have an inspired day.

Steve Jobs: A Personal Tribute

Picture courtesy: Tanita Jha

Thank you for the Apple

(which started it all)

Thank you for the Mac

(which became a staple in my former profession, advertising)

Thank you for the iPod

(which turned my daughter off Barbies and on to music)

Thank you for iTunes

(which accounted for an unfathomable number (okay about 1000) of the following plea: “Mum, please can I buy this song, please, please, pretty please”  and delivered pleasure and music cred in equal amounts)

Thank you for the iPhone

(Which turned whole leagues of my relatives and friends into texting, calling, picture-taking and internet-surfing techno zombos since its debut)

Thank you for the iPad

(which demoted laptops to “clunky” and “cumbersome” for many activities, including checking your Facebook)

Thank you for Monsters Inc

(which tapped into everyone’s childhood fear of monsters in the most delightful way)

Thank you for Toy Story 1, 11 and 111

(for Woody, Buzz Lightyear, Mr.Potato Head, Slinky Dog and Bo Peep and their marvelous adventures)

Thank you for Finding Nemo

(for the unforgettable love story and adventure of Marlin and Dory in their quest to find Nemo)

Thank you for A Bug’s Life, The Incredibles, Cars and all the other wonderful animated films  (Ratatouille, Wall-E, Up) produced by Pixar before and after Disney acquired it

Thank you Steve Jobs, for all these Gifts of Inspiration and for the inspiring life you led

From your ever-grateful consumers and fans, Minoo and Tanita

P.S. Though you are gone, your legacy will live on - in our pockets, backpacks, handbags, briefcases, laptop cases, docking stations, gaming systems, toy baskets and on tv, computer and movie screens - all over the world. And in the dreams of future visionaries like yourself

Our Cake Boss Family

If the Bosses in my family had to have their own reality TV show like Cake Boss, this is what they would be called...

Biryani Boss

When he’s not wowing the world with biryani, here are the interesting things the cameras might capture Biryani Boss doing:

• assembling anything from model trains to a concrete mixer to a home theater system
• chasing or being chased by chickens (yes, chickens, not chicks)
• entertaining you with bathroom humor  (his muse being permanently tuned to the “flatulence jokes” frequency)
• doing his versions of other people’s versions of  the Macarena

Appam Boss

The only one in our family who knows how to make appams; unfortunately rarely enters the kitchen because of excessive competition from South Indian Sappad on Banana Leaf Boss and Biryani Boss -  so the cameras might gather dust.  But, here are interesting other things the cameras might capture Appam Boss busy with, while waiting for the big event:

• taking calls from across the world in the middle of the night
• riding an exercise bike in her backyard  (this bike needs to be seen)
• impersonating Michael Jackson complete with gloves and umbrella
• reeling off Light Rail and VTA bus numbers and station names

South Indian Sappad on Banana Leaf Boss

Extremely versatile, so you could change his name to French Cuisine Boss, Pizza Boss, Tandoori Boss, Thai Food Boss, Banofi Boss and any and all would apply. Here are the interesting things he might be doing when not wowing the world with food:

• singing Hava Nagila, which you can read about here
• keeping abreast of shipping and container industry news
• walking, swimming and doing other things to keep fit
• just being the good-natured reaching-out guy we all know him to be

Barbecue Under the Grape Vines Boss

When not grilling Portobello mushrooms and skewering onions and bell peppers with camera-ready pizzazz, he might be captured on film doing the following:

• playing the banjo or the piano
• listening attentively to his favorite talk show radio host
• working at an easel on his latest hobby - painting 
• tending to his grape vines and related viticulture interests with the TLC of a future Mondavi

Pachadi Boss

Learned from a Tarla Dalal book borrowed from the San Jose Public Library, Pachadi Boss has made and served pachadi to several Westerners and even taught some to make it, among those, the one who alternatively sports orange, red or purple hair, whom you can read about here.  When not chopping up raw food (which her friend Julia has convinced her, is the way to go and which you can read about here), you might find Pachadi Boss doing any of the following...

• furiously typing away on a Gateway laptop 
• talking on the phone while trying to ignore dirty dishes and unmade beds
• meditating while trying to appease offspring
• keeping her Xactly Incent skills shined and primed for the next implementation project

Curry In a Hurry Boss

Can quickly whip up something for a pot-luck.  When not obliging with a dish, she might be found doing any one of these interesting things:

• pampering a very spoiled cat, whom you can read about here and here
• asking where it hurts and prescribing meds to make it go away
• posting pictures, statuses and news on Facebook
• texting on her cellphone with newly learned texting skills

Chappathi Boss

The only one in our family that knows how to make chappathis.  The rest of us have to buy the ready-made versions from Sai Market (a store which sells groceries and also makes good dosas), Cash n Carry, India Bazaar and other Bay Area grocery stores.  When not in the kitchen, Chappathi Boss may be captured doing any of these interesting things:

• tackling a massive HR to-do list in the No. 1 social media company
• checking Slate, Pinterest and other interesting online media
• lending a sympathetic ear to cousins and friends in need
• putting ice up her nose in response to a cooking mishap

         

P.S. We also have other noteworthy Bosses located elsewhere - Mid-West Boss, who has dispatched many recipe books to the West Coast over the years -  including the one featured in my post Top Recipe Secrets, not to mention Bosses in India - including Rasam Boss and Nani’s Recipes Boss.

P.S. 2:  I am also privileged to count among my friends, bosses such as Trifle Boss, Stuffed Bell Peppers Boss, Green Smoothies Boss, Fish Biryani Boss,  Pesarattu Boss, Sushi Boss, Janmashtami Almond Halwa Boss and Bigos Boss.

P.S. 3:  I can name 2 Cake Boss rivals whom I have known a long time, but they are all the way in Australia. One of them recently wowed her guests with a 3-tier cake, vanilla on the base, ribbon in the center, coffee on the top. Back here in the Northern California Bay Area, Margaret’s French Bakery is a respectable Cake Boss and Tanita has fallen in love with their Tiramisu. You can check out their website here.  Margaret’s creates all kinds of cakes, including custom cakes - just like the real article in New Jersey.  To pick up a box of their single serve pastries or desserts, you can either head to their outlet on 750 E McGlincy Lane in Campbell, or look for them at Farmer’s Markets. I discovered them at a Kaiser’s Farmers Market.

P.S. 4:  Would love to know what Bosses you have in your family. 

P.S. 5: This post is part of a series of family-related posts which includes Family Songs, The "Porki & "Bonkers" Tradition and No Need for 23&Me. You can read those here, here and here.