How To Cause Atmost Confusion At the Scripps Spelling Bee….

The Origins of this Post

After yet another Indian kid, Snigdha Nandipati, recently won the Scripps Spelling Bee (the 5th consecutive Indian kid to win, and one of 10 out of 13 last winners who were Indian), Ben Paynter reveals why in a Slate article “Why Are Indian Kids So Good at Spelling”.  He says Indian kids are so formidable, because of having been put through their paces in minor league spelling bee circuits such as the one conducted by the Indian community organization North South Foundation.

Most of the Indian kids who have won the Scripps Spelling Bee are former NSFs (North South Foundationers).

Of course, we who know the real truth know the title of Ben’s article should be amended to: Why Are Indian Kids So Good at Spelling: The Snakes Hypothesis.

After all, as Indians, we are adept at figuring out what each of us is trying to say in English and unique in being nonchalant when told to bring snakes to the party (snacks), to rise the accelator (raise the accelerator) or to have some puncakes (pancakes).

Before you could say jake, I had written this post about our CLASSIC INDIAN PRONUNCIATION MACHINE.

Here goes...

How To Cause Atmost Confusion At the Scripps Spelling Bee....

Have a Bengali read the word Antartica to the contestants in classic Bengali style (Ontortica as in “Ontortica is very cold”)

Have a Mallu read the Love in classic Malu style (Louw as in “I Louv You”)

Have a Gujju read the word Paronomasia from my” Oh Doctor I’m in Trouble” post (“Prawnmosia – panning - as in Minoo's last post”)

Have a Tamilian read the word Coffee in classic Thamil style (Kaafi as in “Have some Kaafi and biscute”)

Have a Bihari read the word Very in classic Bihari style (Berry as in “This coffee berry good”)

Have a Konkan read the word Aunty in classic Konkan style (Anti as in “Anti, is Uncle still in Dubai?”)

Have an Oriyite read the word Prefer – in classic Oriyan style (Prepper as in “I Prepper Copy to Tea”)

Have a Kashmiri read the word Stupid in classic Kashmiri style (Isstoopid as in “Why you have to be an isstoopid in front of my vife?”)

Have an Andhrite read the word Raise in classic Andhra style  (Rise as in “The driving instructor said me to rise the accelator”)

Have a Marati read the word Please in classic Marati style (Pliss as in “Myaadam, what is your good name, pliss?

Have a UPite read the word Texas in classic UPite style (Taxis – as in “My son is in Umrica - Taxis”)

Have a Chandigarhite read the word Developed in classic Chandigarh style (Dev-lept as in ”When I Devlept the property”)

Have a Kannadiga read the word Breakfast in classic Kannadiga style (Brake fast as in “Did you eat your brake fast?”)

Have a Rajasthani read the word Button in classic Rajasthani style (Butt ahn as in “It's cold. Butt ahn your sweeter.")

Have an Anglicised Mangi like myself read the word caught in classic Anglicised Mangi style (Cot – as in “I cot a cold”)

P.S: Want more of the same?  You can get your fill at Samosapedia. Where else?  Also, I am sure each of you have your faves to add to this list. Do share them and also don’t forget to contribute the same to Samosapedia.

P.S. 2: At the end of my post The Mangalorean and The Big Words, I said I was afraid to go to the NCMA Mangy picnic in case they throw sannas at me.  After this post, I now run the risk of being pelted with pakoras , vadas, bondas, samosas, dhoklas, idlis, gol gappas and more.

P.S. 3:  Did you know (this is for my non-Indian reader friends) - India has 28 states, 7 union territories and 18 officially recognized languages with many more dialects.  In fact, I read somewhere that India's schools teach 58 different languages, India has newspapers published in 87 languages, radio programs broadcast in 71 languages and movies produced in 15 languages.

P.S. 4:  If you ever plan to visit India and your journey takes you to Bangalore (why ever not?), don’t forget to time-travel through Bangalore via the timeless posts written by Ajay Sachdev before you go - Oh Bangalore,  Oh Bangalore - Part 2 and Oh Bangalore - Part 3.

P.S. 5: As always thanks for reading and have a great day. Or as they might say (in one part of India or the other),“Have a grite day.” And if you have a child who is in the age range to be a Scripps Spelling Bee contestant, say "Anti Minoo akses, “vy you not in Esscair-Ripps Espelling Bee?” "