How I Went From A Girlie Girl to A Strong, Independent Woman

It Doesn't Matter Where You Started, What Matters Is Where You Plan to End

I learned to live alone.

I learned to drive.

I learned to make my own decisions.

I learned to manage money on my own.

I learned to value myself outside of a relationship.

I learned to value what was in my head and heart, over the way I looked.

I changed my focus to what I did, and how I acted.

I stopped measuring myself against traditional ideas of ‘feminine’ success.

I stopped identifying myself with my child’s successes and failures.

I started setting boundaries on what I would, and would not, accept. 

I stopped being passive-aggressive, and learned to speak up.

I started handling more things on my own.

I became more self-sufficient.

I started getting involved in things I used to hand over to men.  (While I do not know how to fix my car, I get fully involved with every repair – researching the facts and becoming knowledgeable – whether it’s the blend door actuator on my air-conditioner, or a rack and pinion steering issue.) 

I learned to take charge, and make choices which made the most financial sense, covering all the bases - my housing, my car, my taxes, my insurance, my investments, my utilities, my child’s education, my health.

I learned to make my voice heard through my blog.

I learned to stop second guessing myself, and beating myself up for flaws or slips.

I learned to take risks.

Finally, I learned it does not matter where you started.  What matters more is where you plan to end.

So this is my advice to you:

Sit at the table.

Take smart risks.

Seek challenges.

Pursue your goals with gusto.

And know, you can do it, exactly as you are.

You are enough.

Acknowledgements:

Thanks to Sanchita Lobo for her wonderful post - Letter to My daughter on her 18th Birthday - which was published just prior to this post.  Sanchita, you are a gifted writer, and my readers enjoyed your post.

Next, thank you to Ajay, to Ananda, to Ayeisha, to Shalini, and all else, for your heart-warming feedback on my post What I Learned I Could Live Without.  We bloggers thrive on comments, likes, pins, shares, and tweets, from our readers.  It lets us know our posts are read and thought about.

NEXT, Thanks to Robert F Smith for putting the “You Are Enough” idea in my head.  Robert, I am impressed by everything about you and your life.

Finally, to all readers, current and future, thanks for sharing my Journey to Wisdom, Meaning and a Better Life.  Like you, I am trying to find my way through this complex maze we call life, and I am honored to have you share my journey, as I continue to seek the wisdom hidden in plain sight.

A Happy Birthday shout-out:  to those with October birthdays.  Hope you use your birthday month to birth something new and wonderful in your life. A commitment to living more authentically, and doing things which make you strong and independent, is the way to go. 

P.S. Not sure if you have time, but if you do, you may enjoy some prequels to this post: She Victories and What I Learned I Could Live Without.