The Element of Different Dimensions and Its Hope for Realizing Our Self Worth

Picture Courtesy - Beach Dance by Fran Hogan

We live life on many different dimensions.

The physical dimension.

The mental dimension.

The professional dimension.

The intellectual dimension.

The emotional dimension.

The spiritual dimension.

Within these dimensions, we live on different dimensions as well.

In the physical dimension, there are our cars, our houses, our bodies, our clothes; what they are and the state they are in, will show the imprint of our priorities

We may have small cluttered apartments (like moi), but regularly exercised bodies.

We may watch a lot of movies but read no books, or vice versa.

We may be into sports; or into politics.

We may have one solid relationship with a spouse or partner; or just many friendships.

I am so glad we live life on many different dimensions.

If it makes prioritizing a challenge, it also gives us hope to shine in different areas.

When I suffered my depression, (My post “If Life Is So Good, Why Do I Feel So Sad?” tells you more), I was doing so well in many different areas -  making money (the high water mark as it turns out), enjoying professional success, working out 7 days a week. I also had a relaxed work schedule in which I was able to include 1 hr. massages twice a week. If I didn’t feel so bad about my depression, it was because I could go on with all these activities regardless. It was very encouraging.

We must not expect when we take a hit –professional, personal, relationship, financial–all hope is lost.  Because we live life on so many different dimensions, there will always be bright spots -areas in our lives where we can continue to realize our self worth.

On the physical dimension - we can look after our health.  Many exercises can be done right where we are – floor exercises, chair exercises. We can learn to meditate so we can control our stress and improve the quality of our sleep.

On the professional dimension – we can read, we can listen to tapes, we can look for opportunities to improve our skills; we can find new avenues to pursue.

On the mental dimension – we can seek advice and follow it.  From therapists, from books, from people we trust.

On the spiritual dimension, we can study the holy books. We can pray.  We can learn to meditate. Meditation can help us release bad thoughts and habits.

When I was at Scios – a job I have referred to in several posts, including The United States of Friendship Part 8 - Julia, it didn’t take me long to figure the job was not going to work out.

The assignment happened when my Mum needed me most at home. I could not telecommute. I spent a great deal of the day away from home because the commute took so long. The work also turned out to be not a good fit. The bits I could do were terribly tedious; the rest was above my skill level – Access rather than Excel based; charts and rate curves, not pivot tables and vlookups. I could not experience what Abraham Maslow calls “the flow” – the ideal state for productivity and peak performance.

During the day, I would receive calls from the different organizations and people involved with Mummy’s care; I would have to step away into a conference room to take these calls, none of which were short, and my boss couldn't help but notice.

While all these strikes were building up against me, I had started attending Toastmasters 3 evenings a month. If I was failing to make an impact at Scios, I was making a huge impact at Toastmasters. I was one of their most promising initiates right from my Icebreaker speech on. I zipped through my 10 speeches and earned my CTM in no time. And I won 2 awards, one of them featured in my post “How I Lost A Thousand Dollars on Donuts”.

My point is no matter what life throws at us, we need to focus on “the things we can do”, rather than “the things we can’t”

There will always be an area, or areas, of our life in which we can thrive and shine.

For some of us, this could be cooking….no matter what goes on in the big bad world out there, as soon as we enter the kitchen, the spotlight is on us, and we are a star……the proof is anything we cook  is gone in a blink.

For some of us, it could be maintaining a beautiful home.  We have an eye for decor and home organization.

For some of us, it could be being in great physical shape.  We run, we work out….we continue to stay in great shape even when life throws us a curve ball.

For some of us, it’s our spiritual strength.  We pray, we focus on spiritual activities; this is what gets us through.

We must never define success too narrowly.

If we do, we may give up on things unnecessarily.

The current Dalai Lama is not a vegetarian. But he is a model Buddhist and a truly wise and noble spiritual leader; Buddhists the world over are glad the Dalai Lama didn’t say, “I am not qualified to be the Dalai Lama - because I am not a vegetarian”

Let me tell you about my own experience with vegetarianism. My desire to be vegetarian was awakened by reading a chapter from a Lewis Carroll book called Sylvie and Bruno.  If you are curious, clicking this link will take you to to the chapter – which is included in my Amazon review of Anita Saran’s book On Becoming A Vegetarian – One Woman’s Experience. But I succeeded at being vegetarian for only 3 years.  Does this mean I consider myself a failure and a lost cause? No.  I am very grateful for the experience. My hope is some day, I will achieve it. For now, I focus on building up my mental, physical, intellectual and spiritual strengths –I know when I do that, I can achieve many things. Vegetarianism may be one of them.

I am glad instead of dwelling on what was happening at Scios, I focused on getting better and better at Toastmasters, and also seeing what I could do to improve my mother’s situation at home without me; I got Meals on Wheels to deliver food twice a day, I enrolled Mum in a Senior Day program, I contacted Catholic Charities to have one of their volunteers come visit her; and Nadya, who is the subject of my post The United States of Friendship – Part - 7 - Nadya took over Mum’s medical appointments, also taking her to lunch or a movie when she could.

None of it was perfect; Mummy disliked being alone at home, she disliked going to the senior day care; she grudgingly went for the lunches; she felt vulnerable and alone at home with her arthritis, her diabetes and all her conditions; but at least I had engaged all the available resources to help her.

We should aim for excellence and do the best we can. Perfection is the enemy of excellence.

We should also focus on our strengths. When there are things we can’t do because we are in a situation where our hands are tied, we should focus on the things we can do. Spend our time doing that.

I have mentioned cooking, and home decor, and staying in shape.

If we put any of these talents to use helping others, our self-worth will be even more improved.

If we are good at cooking, we can help someone that way; if we are good at taxes, we can help someone that way; if we are good at make-up, we can do someone’s make up for them, if we can dance, we can teach someone dancing, if we know Excel, we can teach someone Excel; Teaching, I’ve discovered, is one of the most psychically rewarding things one can do.

One can also set out to learn something new, especially if it could be life-changing. Overcoming any inhibition; kicking any bad habit will be life changing.  It will make us feel like nothing else can. 

In my own life, I discovered the psychic reward of being able to give up anger was priceless.  The psychic rewards of learning to meditate likewise. You can read my posts The Path to Change and Connected Minds for more on that.

Remember, change can happen in a flash; your life can turn positive in a flash; if you think you are getting nowhere in any dimension of your life, focus on the dimensions of your life where you are getting somewhere.

Do what I say to do in my post How to Feel Good About Yourself  When the Chips are Down.

No matter what the challenges, stay with your strengths, while you make small incremental changes on the areas in which you are weak; Even when you make those incremental changes, don’t look for outcomes; just look for additional improvements in effort and be pleased with your progress on that front.

You have so much more to offer the world outside of the area of your life in which you are weak - your talents, your skills, your attitude; the fact you have made something of yourself, and you have gotten this far and are still going.

Just put one foot in front of the other. Focus on the things you can impact and change. Accept the things you can’t. Nothing else matters.

Thanks for reading and have a great day and week…..M……a Pearl Seeker like you.