We cannot do anything about the past.
Someone may have suffered terribly in the past.
They may have experienced a precarious, unstable life.
Or hope may have been snatched early from their lives.
They may have had limited opportunities or chances.
Or they may have been deprived of opportunities and chances
altogether.
They may have been sidelined and made to believe they would not amount
to anything.
Or they may have not had the chance to learn life skills.
We cannot change the past.
But we can help change someone’s future.
We can give them the chances they never had.
We can open our hearts to them.
We can help put stability in their lives.
We can help them put the traumas of their past behind them.
We can help them make a fresh start.
We can reach out whether someone is in crisis, or is in danger, or
is at risk, or just needs a break.
We can put on our thinking caps and step up to the plate.
In every generation, in every period in history, there are
examples of people who changed lives by putting on their thinking caps and
stepping up to the plate.
The need of the hour may be different in different countries and
in different periods.
What was required in America during the time when Abraham Lincoln
was President of the United States was different from what was required in
Europe during the 2nd World War, and this was different
from what was required during India’s Independence movement, and this was
different from what was required during the Civil Rights movement era led by
Martin Luther King, and this was different from what was required in the years
following the Vietnam War.
What was required in America during the time when Abraham Lincoln
was President of the United States was for as many people as possible to throw
their weight behind the ending of slavery and keeping the Union intact.
What was required in Europe during the 2nd World War,
were heroes who were willing to risk their lives to save the Jewish people from
Hitler’s killing machine and to put an end to that machine.
What was required in India in the years leading up to 1947 was for the Indian people
to support Mahatma Gandhi in his efforts to lead India to independence from the British Raj.
What was required during the Civil Rights movement era led by
Martin Luther King was for institutions and establishments and brave
individuals to throw their weight behind the efforts to end segregation.
What was required in the years following the Vietnam War was for
countries and individuals to help rehabilitate the 2 million people who fled
Vietnam to escape persecution by the Communist regime.
Throughout history, people have responded to the need of the hour.
Open a book about any war, or any crisis, and you will find a list
of heroes who dropped what they were doing to help.
The list of people who helped save the Jews from Hitler’s cruel and senseless killing
machine is long.
A broad swath of people, different in age, gender, ethnicity and
nationality, risked their safety to get involved and help the Jewish people.
Read the biography of Anne Frank, and you will find out about Victor Kugler,
Johannes
Kleiman, Miep Gies, and Bep Voskuijl
and their spouses – the brave band of people who helped Anne Frank’s family
live in hiding for 2 years, before they were captured and sent to the camps.
Or watch Schindler’s List to meet another hero from that time.
The fact that in spite of their bravery, 6 million Jews still died indicates much more needed to be done, and more people should have gotten involved.
Moving to the 70s and the end of the Vietnam War, we learn that between the years 1975 and 1995, 2 million
people fled Vietnam seeking refuge in other countries.
They had a tough time making a fresh start in their new home
countries, but thanks to the people who opened their homes and hearts to them, many of them got the help they needed to start a new life.
I learned of one story first hand.
Binh’s Story
When I first arrived in America, I did temp admin work. You may
know that from some of my previous posts.
I also learned driving only after I came to America.
While still a very new, very nervous driver, I got a temp admin
job in Mountain View, which was 20 miles away from where I lived.
It was a challenge to get to work on time after dropping off Tanita at day care and to be back in the evening to pick her up.
I would get stuck in horrible traffic.
I decided to look for someone to carpool with. If we rode in the carpool lane, the commute would be shorter.
He was a gentleman named Binh.
Binh and me started going to work together.
I would drive to his house in San Jose, park my car outside his house, and
then ride with him to work in his pick-up truck.
He would drop me off at my job in Mountain View, and then go on to
his job at Sun Microsystems in Palo Alto.
In the evening after work, he would pick me up from work, and give me a ride
back to his house, where I would get into my car and head straight to Tanita's day care.
I was glad to contribute to the gas.
“You are so lucky,” Binh would say to me, every time I started to
complain about life in America. “Don’t complain.
You have family here. They gave you a
car to drive when you got here. I had nothing when I came to America. You don't know how lucky you are.”
Binh made me aware of my blessings.
As one of the people who had escaped Vietnam by boat and landed on
US shores, he came to America with nothing but the shirt on his back. He had no
family and he did not know a soul.
He was very grateful when a family in the mid-West agreed to
take him in and provide for his needs, until he was able to become independent.
He stayed with them until he was able to get his footing.
“I didn’t know a word of
English,” Binh said, “so all I could
do was nod my head and smile at whatever they said to me when I first met them.”
Bit by bit, with the help of his host family, Binh learned English, and
the other skills he needed to make a life in America.
But it would be 17 long years before his wife and his children
would be able to come over from Vietnam and join him.
His experience and mine were so different.
Indeed, when I came to America, I had family here and I knew
English, both of which were huge advantages.
Which is why Binh would say to me again and again: “You are so lucky” “You are
so lucky”.
As I write this post, I think about the family who took in Binh
and helped him get on his feet.
They responded to the need of the hour.
And I think about the CCF sponsor who sent money to my brother
when we were growing up in India.
She responded to the need of the hour.
And I think about the American family in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, who
hosted my sister Angela for her senior year in high school under the AFS program.
They responded to the need of the hour.
And their actions had a lasting impact.
Binh has made a successful life in America.
My brother grew up to have a fantastic career in marketing, first in England, then
in America.
My sister Angela returned to India from her AFS year with a desire to go back again as a student, which she did for her PhD.
Yes, when we use what we have to reach out to someone, it can have
a lasting and far-reaching impact.
My Own Story
Then there is my own story.
As each temp job came to an end, I would get anxious. Would I be
able to get another job? Would I earn enough money to cover my expenses and Tanita's expenses? Would I fail at my job? Would the job end with no hope of permanency like all the other jobs?
I was extra nervous, because I had no prior experience being an admin assistant and was awkward at it.
When Palm Inc gave me my first permanent job, because it was an admin assistant job, I continued to feel
vulnerable. I hadn't gotten very good at admin work, and I wondered when I would get busted. You may
remember one of my close calls from my post The United States of Friendship Part 2.
Then a wonderful thing happened.
There was an opening for a junior Commissions Analyst, and my boss
suggested I talk to the hiring manager about it.
At first, I was reluctant to, because I did not know Excel, and I
did not even know what a Commissions Analyst did, but I thought what did I have to lose by asking.
Besides, Laura was a friendly soul, and she was among a group of
people I regularly ate lunch with.
At first Laura said no – she needed someone with experience.
But when I offered to help her in my spare time (a brainwave of my then boss), she accepted the help, which indicated she was willing to keep an open mind and consider the possibility that I could do the job.
Shortly after, she confirmed it by giving me the position.
It was the start of a brand new career for me.
Laura helped me find my footing.
She taught me to navigate the spreadsheets and understand the
language of commissions.
I went on to master Excel and to handle commissions for Palm on my
own.
Commissions Administration has been my career since.
I went on to learn Centive in my next job.
After that, I learned Xactly and went on to join an implementations
team.
In the past 2 years, I have learned Varicent and been a Commissions Consultant,
helping companies who need a temporary or transition Commissions Analyst or
Manager to administer commissions on Excel, Xactly or Varicent.
All this has happened because one brave Commissions Manager –
Laura H - decided to take a chance on an unknown, unproven and inexperienced
person all those many years ago.
She changed my life.
Indeed, we can brighten someone’s future and improve their
prospects with a single decision, with a single call, with a single stroke of our
pen.
We don’t have to wait for someone to tell us what the need of the
hour is.
We could look around us, find out what it is that's needed, and then step up to the plate.
We shouldn’t waste our words, or our position, or our thoughts, by not
using them.
We should not throw them away on frivolities, which only make us
feel bad after.
We should use what we have to make a difference.
One of the reasons we delay using our powers to make a difference
is because we think “I still haven’t achieved this or I still haven’t achieved
that. I still haven’t got this or I
still haven’t got that. When I have accomplished my goals, then I will think
about other people’s needs.”
Another reason is we are quick to think of ourselves as victims, whenever our help is needed. “Oh my arthritis. Oh, I am already paying so much in taxes and my taxes are supposed to go to organizations who do this. Oh, I am not in a good position myself ”
Steven Tyler says “If you have a candle, the light won't glow any
dimmer if I light yours off of mine.”
We don't lose by sharing, while we continue to pursue our goals.
Our lives become enriched.
Can a goal reached, or a dream fulfilled, or more success than we
could ever dream of, leave us feeling empty?
Yes, if we have not had what Albert Schweitzer calls a reverence for life, while pursuing those
goals.
If we have the power of words, and we have used the power of our
words, only for ourselves, it may leave us feeling empty.
If we have a gift, and we have used our gift, only to enhance our
own lives, it may leave us feeling empty.
If we have time on our hands, and we have used our time, only to
entertain and amuse ourselves, we may feel empty.
If we are in a powerful position, and we have used that powerful position, only
to enhance our own position further, we may feel empty.
But we can change this any time we want.
We can make the choice….
To become a change agent
To become a hope creator
To become a guardian angel
To become a light in someone’s life
To help others achieve their dreams, even while we achieve ours.
To brighten someone’s day and to feel blessed because of it.
Imagine seeing smiles of confidence sprout where we planted the
seeds of hope in someone’s life.
What could be better than that?
As always thanks for reading and have
a great day and week…..M…..a Pearl-Seeker like you. Thanks to Ajay for his
comments on my last post, and thanks to the rest of you for your votes and pins. Much appreciated. Wishing all of you a Very Happy Thanksgiving. Have a blessed day.
